Editor
Anyway... Where we last left off, we were stranded with no knowledge of even the basic direction the home base is in! Yaaaaaaaaay. After some aimless wandering, I determine that I'm never finding the ENORMOUS ****ING MOUNTAIN that I built my base into the side of, and decide to build a new base somewhere else. But we're not building it into the side of a wall this time, oh no, I just lose those bases repeatedly, now, NOW what we're going to do is dig a big ****ing trench in the ground and drop a roof on it.
I quickly dig out a big rectangular pit in the ground. I then dig a stairway leading back up. Between the pit and the stairway, I build a wall, then return to the surface and lay down a roof. So, to get inside, you go down the stairs, then through the door. Simple, easy, effective, and much more visible. But not visible enough yet, oh no, but we'll get to that in a minute.
After some harvesting of wood from nearby trees, I create the essentials: a few large chests and a furnace, and drop my crafting table inside my new home as well. During my aimless wandering I found some Coal, which I use to make a bunch of Torches, which I place around the base to make it all bright and happy inside. I then pick a direction and start digging down. I quickly find a little off-shoot cavern, where an underground waterfall and a lava flow meet... this sounds familiar, and I'm treating it with maximum caution this time. Nearby, though, is some blue ore that I want: I mine it and find Lapis Lazuli.
I start dicking around with the water and lava, trying to get rid of one or both of them, when I notice some odd black rocks... Obsidian. The Minecraft Wiki informs me that this is somewhat rare to find naturally, difficult to harvest safely, and can only be harvested at all with a Diamond Pickaxe. Which I don't have. Damn. I head back for my home base to deposit my Lapis Lazuli into a chest when I see... some light blue ore.
...no way.
A few moments later, I have four nice, shiny diamonds. Back at base, I drop one into a chest and turn the rest into a Diamond Pickaxe. I then head back downtown to figure how to get at that delicious, delicious Obsidian. First order of business: kill the water, which is easily done. Now I just need to CAREFULLY mine this **** without it falling into lava, or ME falling into lava. Which I manage for a good majority of the blocks. Yay.
With Obsidian in hand (or rather in chest) and a smile in my heart, I continue downward. I find some Redstone, as well as lots of Coal and Iron (but I haven't even been mentioning those lately), and I find a Diamond or two. Gold has still been a no-show though. Back at base I craft a Compass, a Map, and some Shears; I then Shear some sheep and craft a bed. I've always learned since last time that I need to actually SLEEP in the bed to change my respawn point, so I make sure to do that this time.
I then took a few minutes to expand my base a little and add a mini-pyramid on top, and at the top of the pyramid I put a tower, and at the top of the tower I put some torches, and I also put torches all around my base, so hopefully between all that and my map, I won't fucking lose it this time.
Back in my mine, I continued downward, hit bedrock, picked a different direction, hit bedrock again, decided to go play in a lava cavern I found earlier, fell in lava, nearly died, managed to live, decided that this lava had to go, got rid of the lava, found some more diamond and a ton of redstone, and hit bedrock again. It may be time for me to pack up and set out for a different area, because my present location seems rather thoroughly mined. Maybe I'm not such a long way away from worrying about stuff like minecarts after all!
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Liberal Arts Major
It all converts to obsidian. As a building material... I wouldn't worry about it. At all. It takes too fucking long to dig up.
15 seconds per makes it annoying if you ever want to rebuild.
<->
"What the fuck is Alice doing in Wonderland anyway? Who the fuck told her she could leave the god damn kitchen in the first place?" -Random guy on Xbox Live
http://www.backloggery.com/kodan882
Editor
A quick visit to the Minecraft Wiki's crafting recipes page informed me of the existence of a Boat, which means that my days of traversing lakes and oceans by holding down a direction and the space bar and then doing something else for fifteen minutes are over forever. I deposited everything important in my home base's chest for safe keeping, then gathered a setting-out pack of essential supplies: iron tools, a map, shears for sheep, some cobblestone, a crafting table, some wood, some sticks, some coal, around 40 torches, etc. I dropped my boat into water and attempted to jump into it.
...This pushed it away from me and I lost it to the ocean's grasp. Goddammit.
Okay, this time using right click to actually ENTER the boat... I set sail to the southwest and quickly found a small, natural cave. Expanding downward, I found... a whole lot of nothing. Some coal and iron and redstone, but nothing new or amazing. I marked the outside of the cave with a few torches to note that I had been there, and headed back to home base. While I was there, I nabbed my Diamond Pickaxe to expedite the mining process.
This time I set out for the southeast, and came upon a frozen lake. Leaving my boat behind (or rather smashing it into the outer banks because PILOTING A BOAT IS HARD GUYS), I headed across the icy surface inland. I found a natural cave and began making my way downward. What I found was a massive network of interconnecting caverns, full of ore of all kinds. Coal, iron, and redstone were in abundance, but I also quickly found some Diamond Ore. I mined that, and it led me to some GOLD ORE, which I quickly mined as well. At that point I stopped and tried to determine how to proceed exploring the cave, given the snaking and intertwining streams and lava flows that threatened to kill me mercilessly. But this time I had come prepared: I whipped out my bucket and used it on the nearby waterfall!
One trip to the Minecraft Wiki later, I learned that I could only use Buckets on water source blocks; running water did not count. Goddammit.
I continued exploring the cavern as carefully as I could. I mined around and found what I thought was a safe way of advancing downward: a hole that would deposit me onto a stone and obsidian pathway next to a lava flow. All I would have to do is avoid the lava, but that would not be an issue. I dropped down, and promptly fell into the lava and died.
Goddammit.
There goes my Diamond Pickaxe, too.
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Liberal Arts Major
<->
"What the fuck is Alice doing in Wonderland anyway? Who the fuck told her she could leave the god damn kitchen in the first place?" -Random guy on Xbox Live
http://www.backloggery.com/kodan882
Editor
Plus, nobody wants to watch me play games. What I generally excise from these writeups are all the instances of "I spend 45 minutes examining a wall thoroughly, convinced it holds some secret. ...it does not." >_>
Anyway! No Minecraft update yet, but I've been playing two other games!
-VVVVVV is a fun game. The level design in it is really good, very imaginative and with a good level of challenge. The visual style is crisp and never intrusive. My issue with the game is the controls, which blow straight past "slippery" and into just plain "bad". If you're going to make the player do pixel perfect jumps, the player needs a way of moving around a few pixels at a time. VVVVVV doesn't want to let you move any length shorter than "enormous", no matter how briefly you press the arrow keys.
I actually managed to beat the game last night, in like two sittings. At just under 4 hours it was not a long game for me. Then again, I only collected 13 of the 20 shiny trinkets and didn't touch the time trials or map packs by other developers that were included with this version of VVVVVV. So there's quite a bit of game left, if I choose to pursue it.
-Aquaria is an awesome game. Very much Castlevania but underwater. New Castlevania, that is. (Metroid somewhat less so, at least right now.)
After getting thoroughly lost in my character's own home, I found a new song (songs functioning halfway between spells and traditional Metroidvania abilities) that let me move rocks, which allowed me to access the first "dungeon", the Energy Temple. Inside I dueled a ball of light and gained the ability to become a being of pure energy, which I used shortly thereafter to kill a fallen god worshiped by a dead race who were so devoted to warfare that they destroyed both their own civilization and a neighboring one.
This was the first dungeon in the game. I'm not even out of the tutorial yet, really.
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Provisional
---
LMAO he ain't my lover I'm not into guys -Tengu
Liberal Arts Major
<->
"What the fuck is Alice doing in Wonderland anyway? Who the fuck told her she could leave the god damn kitchen in the first place?" -Random guy on Xbox Live
http://www.backloggery.com/kodan882
Editor
We're headed to Aquelia, Etruria's capital. Roartz and Arcard have been put in a bit of a tough place, because the St. Elimine Church chose to endorse Roy's attack on Aquelia. POLITICS'd /laugh
On the not so bright side, Arcard and Roartz do have the support of Narshen. We're gonna go in and send him packing, all the way back to Tim Horton's.
So, this is a HUGE chapter. There is so much to do. 10 chests to be unlocked. Three enemies to steal from, including Narshen. This chapter is the fucking who's who of recurring foes and bosses: there's Narshen, Arcard, Roartz, Douglas, and two mamkutes. I need to recruit a mage named Hugh with Roy and recruit a wyvernrider named Zeiss with Miledy. There's a secret shop to visit. Enemies with Bolting and Berserk Staves. All manner of crazy crap going on. Oh, and if I want to go to the Gaiden chapter, I have to keep Douglas alive, despite him being an unrecruitable enemy boss.
I'm probably going to blast him with a Sleep Staff and hope for the best.
Oh hey, good news zone. Arcard and Roartz run off like the cowards they are. Douglas refuses to go with them, though, and in fact hangs around as an enemy unit because... fuck if I know. Probably just to piss me off.
Meanwhile, Murdock has shown up to reprimand Narshen for being such a failure. He says that Narshen is being demoted from his position as one of Bern's Three Dragon Lords. Ya know, I kind of assumed that that was like... a plot device thing that certain people were born into or destined to be, not something you could just be demoted from for not keeping up your quota. Did Bern just put up a sign in their window - Entry level position available as one of our Three Dragon Lords! High pay, flexible hours, potential for advancement! Call 555-2373 to schedule an interview. Serious applications only; must have own dragon. - or something?
Narshen is understandably upset about this, but to be fair, he hasn't done a single thing successfully since the game started. He's pretty much just run away from confrontations and delegated important tasks to weaker units. Or just... not done anything. He was supposed to take Arcadia personally but fuck if he bothered to show up at all.
Narshen: I have to do WORK to keep my JOB? This is the biggest outrage since Resident Evil 4 went multiplatform!
Murdock gives Narshen one last chance to destroy the Lycia Alliance Army and redeem himself, then exits. Narshen hatches a plan to claim that Miledy's brother, Zeiss, has been leaking information to the Lycia Alliance Army and that's what caused all his various fuck ups. Because lord knows it couldn't just be his incompetence.
Narshen: This plan had better work! If I lose my job, how will I afford my limited edition Card Captor Sakura DVDs?!
Lance promotes. HP +3, Str +2, Skl +2, Spd +2, Def +2, Res +3, Con +2.
Roy levels. HP, Skl, Spd, Res. Not bad.
Sophia levels. HP, Res. God. You're nearly as bad as Lugh. 11 Magic at level 18? What the fuck is wrong with you. You should have 15 or more!
Lalum levels. HP, Spd, Luk, Def.
Dieck levels. HP, Str, Spd, Luk.
Oh **** one of the mages attacking me is Hugh, a guy I can recruit. Roy, I choose you!
Hugh: Do you have a shortage in magicians?
Roy: ? Well, I guess we could always use more.
Roy knows that the best classes in FE are the magic classes. *nods approvingly*
Recruited Hugh for 8000 gold. Probably overpaid but oh well.
Sophia levels. HP, Magic.
Did they seriously just...
Okay, I put up with the reinforcements that could move on the turn they appeared.
I even put up with it when those same reinforcements were given Killing Edges.
GIVING REINFORCEMENTS BOLTING?
I'VE MADE TOO MANY COMPROMISES ALREADY, FIRE EMBLEM. NO MORE. THE LINE MUST BE DRAWN HERE. THIS FAR, AND NO FURTHER!
Lalum levels. HP, Luk, Res.
Sophia levels. Magic, Spd, Res.
Sophia's stats at level 20:
HP 28 (average 26.4)
Magic 13 (average 16.45)
Skl 12 (average 9.6)
Spd 10 (average 9.7)
Luk 6 (average 6.8)
Def 7 (average 4.8)
Res 19 (average 18.45)
So, she did really well in everything EXCEPT THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS.
And I have no Guiding Ring to promote her. Back of the party with ye, lass!
Clarine levels. HP, Magic, Skl, Luk. God, I love this ****ing valkyrie.
Rutger levels. Skl, Spd, Luk.
Miledy levels. HP. damn you miledy
Lalum levels. Luk.
Lance levels. HP, Str. Lance is now level 20/2 and has the Strength he would have on average at level 20/16. <_<
Lilina levels. Magic, Spd, Def. yessssss.
........and I just forgot to steal the mamkute's Red Gem, so I reset to steal it, and then forgot to steal it again, so... I'm just moving on now.
Wolt levels. HP, Str, Luk.
Geese promotes. HP +5, Str +3, Skl +4, Spd +1, Def +3, Con +3.
I send Miledy to recruit Zeiss. Oddly, Zeiss will actually attack Miledy if you let him. But whatever. He's recruited now. Miledy convinces him that Zephiel is a prick, etc.
Lalum levels. HP, Luk.
Lalum's FINAL stats:
HP 30 (average 27.3)
Str 4 (average 2.9)
Spd 20 (MAX) (average MAX)
Luk 24 (average 24.2)
Def 7 (average 5.8)
Res 8 (average 9.7)
You might think this looks really good, but I'm actually sort of upset about those 1-2 missing points of Res. Not that I plan to let Lalum get hit, but stuff like Bolting exists. The only equivalent for physical defense is, what, ballistae? /laugh
Thany/Dieck A-rank support acquired!
Dieck: ...Don't get cocky, kid.
STOP STEALING LINES FROM STAR WARS
Okay, stole Narshen's Blue Gem and Delphi Shield.
Now then: Miledy vs. Narshen! ROUND 1, FIGHT!
Miledy: My loyalty is with the princess. And so it shall remain. *critical hit*
best character
Miledy vs. Narshen! ROUND 2, FIGHT!
Narshen: I am strong... I am wise... I am handsome... And I am right! Always! More than anybody!
"I can't go play outside, mom! Somebody is wrong on the internet!" *hits, steals HP*
Miledy vs. Narshen! FINAL ROUND... FIGHT!
Narshen: No... No...!! I will not be defeated...! Not by you... Worthless... Gaahh!!!
"Tell... my realdoll... I love her..."
FATALITY! Miledy wins!
Miledy levels. HP, Str, Skl, Spd. Best character.
Lilina levels. Magic, Skl.
Okay, now the secret shop. It's got all the promotion items, a Lockpick, and... Angelic Robes?! WHAT. I WANT ALL OF THOSE KTHX. ...But I'm probably way too cautious and only buy 3 despite having a metric fuckton of money.
Sophia promotes. HP +2, Magic +4, Skl +2, Spd +3, Def +2, Res +2, Con +1.
Okay, scan the map. All items stolen except the Red Gem, which is the price I paid for forgetting about it TWICE. My own personal idiot tax. All 10 chests looted. All enemies killed, including the ones I needed a Long Bow to kill. All characters recruited. Douglas is still alive (in case you're curious, I wasted two shots from my Sleep Staff on him before realizing that the best idea would be to just disarm Clarine and put her next to him. He's wasted the last 30 or so turns trying in vain to hit her.)
Time to conquer the throne. That wasn't an exaggeration, by the way. I spent 53 turns on that chapter. In fairness, I only brought one thief, and the enemies with Bolting/Purge kept me locked down for 15 turns, but yeah. That's still terrible.
King Mordred tells us that the Tower of the Saint has been taken by Bern's forces. It's a shrine to St. Elimine or some such, so there's a Divine Weapon there. GAIDEN CHAPTER TIME. (We got this chapter because we kept Douglas alive, by the way. That wasn't just me being nice.)
After Mordred leaves, Elfin says something to the effect of, "sorry father, someday I will return for good". Oh so I guess Elfin is the prince then. Did I just MISS that being revealed earlier or something? I dunno. [/spoiler]
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
There's basically no story here. A corrupt bishop from the St. Elimine church was following Roartz's orders, but now the following has effectively happened:
Roartz: I am outta here. laterz
Windam: Wait, what about me?
Roartz: I dunno. What about you?
Windam: ... =(
Windam decides that if he's going down, he's taking the Lycia Alliance Army down with him. He tells a subordinate to prep the "Heavenly Arrows". These are the level's gimmick; they're bolts of light that fall in vertical lines at the end of every turn, dealing 10 damage to everything they hit. They're completely worthless and never inconvenienced me at all.
Also, Douglas has joined our party! yaaaaay another prepromote I'll never use.
Alan levels. HP, Skl, Luk.
Lance levels. HP, Str, Skl, Spd.
I can see a reset in my future: the boss has a Berserk staff, and I forgot to bring any Restore staves.
Okay never mind, the boss berserked Chad. Twice. That, I can deal with.
Wolt levels. HP, Skl.
Sophia levels. HP, Def, Res.
Roy levels. HP, Str, Spd, Luk.
Roy's stats at level 20:
HP 33 (average 33.2)
Str 13 (average 12.6)
Skl 14 (average 14.5)
Spd 15 (average 14.6)
Luk 16 (average 18.4)
Def 12 (average 9.75)
Res 10 (average 5.7)
classic roywood... is what I would say if those defensive stats weren't so amazing. What the fuck happened there? I have no idea, but I appreciate it.
Lilina levels. Magic. Ehhhh.
Sophia levels. Spd. God damn it.
Alan takes out the boss and levels. HP, Luk.
Throne conquered. We get the Pinnacle of Light, Aureola, Saint Elimine's spellbook.
Saul: What's this about areolas?
Roy: No, Aureola. Aureola.
Saul: Oh, I see. How very disappointing...
Roy tells Guinevere he needs to talk to her, but she already knows what it's about. They're going to have to invade Bern next. Guinevere gives Roy the Fire Emblem, and tells him that it's the key to unlocking the Shrine of Seals and acquiring the
The next few chapters are going to deal with the Ilia route. During CG7's stream we went to the Sacae route instead. "whoops". In any case, if you don't want to be spoiled for whatever reason, they have been clearly marked.
[Spoiler for Fire Emblem 6, chapter 17 Ilia route, click to show]Chapter 17A
Roy's capture of Aquelia was the killing blow for the Coup d'etat movement in Aquelia. The Anti-Coup d'etat forces received massive Etrurian support and drove the Coup d'etat forces led by Arcard and Roartz all the way into Bern-occupied Ilia. The Anti-Coup d'etat forces then joined with the Lycia Alliance Army to create the Etrurian Army, which, led by Roy and receiving the support of the St. Elimine Church, marched on Ilia en route to Bern itself. The wheel of fate is turning... But Roy must now face Murdock, the leader of Bern's Three Dragon Lords, as well as the Ilian mercenaries who chose to ally with Bern. See, this is great. I wish Fire Emblem games were always like this, instead of going, "oh and by the way the main villain up til now is actually possessed by/taking orders from/trying to awaken an evil god. time to ignore all the politics in favor of generic fantasy bullshit."
For the record, whether you end up in 17A or 17B depends on which units have more EXP: Sue and Shin, or Thany and Thite. The only unit of the four that I used was Thany, so I'm in 17A. *shrug*
So Roartz and Arcard (who is now translated as Alcard; fantastic romhack imo) have been politics'd by Murdock. Arcard has been left to fend us off here, while Roartz is being sent deeper into Ilia to prepare defenses there.
But whatever. We finally get to take out a recurring baddie. I'm okay with this.
Geese levels. HP, Str, Spd.
Lance levels. Str, Spd, Def. god I love that paladin. This level up gives him 22 Str, or his average Str at level 20/20. He's 20/4. Best ever. Sadly his cap is 25, so it can't get truly hilarious. =/
Thany levels. HP, Spd, Luk, Def.
I'm using Thany to take out the ballistae, by the way. Why? Because I can. also because of the Delphi Shield
Lilina levels. HP, Magic, Res.
Sophia levels. HP, Magic, Res.
Dieck levels. HP, Spd, Luk.
Geese levels. HP, Luk.
So, we finally took down Arcard.
Arcard: I am... an Etrurian... noble... I must not... die here...
Looks like this wasn't a part...
*sunglasses*
...of Arcard's plan.
The after-mission plot reveals that Zephiel assassinated his own father. AS IF THAT'S A SURPRISE. classic roywood not being able to figure that out before now. [/spoiler]
[Spoiler for Fire Emblem 6, chapter 18 Ilia route, click to show]Chapter 18A
By the way, I've heard conflicting reports about whether this path is actually A or B, but whatever, it doesn't matter too much. In any case, we're in the frozen depths of Ilia, and facing a corrupt priest named Martel. Also, Roy had a conversation with Guinevere:
Roy: I made you some coffee.
Guinevere: What? Oh... thank you, Roy.
Roy: It's hot, isn't it?
Guinevere: Yes, very hot.
Roy: That's iced coffee.
Guinevere: What?
Roy: I had Lilina make it cold.
Guinevere: Oh... of course it's cold.
Roy: I lied. It's actually hot.
*Guinevere drops mug*
Hilarious.
Anyway, Martel has an old woman named Niime with him; she's a master of elder magic, and he's making her cast some weird weather control spell.
Miledy levels. HP. augh, disgusting.
Wolt levels. Spd, Def, Res.
Rutger levels. Str, Skl, Spd, Luk. yessssss
Thany levels. HP, Res.
Miledy levels. ........HP. That's two in a row, Miledy.
Rutger levels. HP. God damn it. This chapter.
Thany levels. HP, Spd.
On turn 7, Niime casts her spell after warning Martel repeatedly that she has no control over what it does. Surprise surprise, it freezes the rivers, allowing us easy access to the boss. I had pretty much already routed the enemy with Thany and Miledy, however. Thany immediately went over and double critted the boss to death. I do some support grinding and then conquer the castle.
Roy frees Niime, who explains that she only joined Bern so she could study their Dragons. She believes that Bern has managed to resurrect the Dark Dragon that Hartmut defeated in the Dragon-Human Wars; the Dark Dragon is unique in that it has the power to create more Dragons. Niime joins the party. [/spoiler]
[Spoiler for Fire Emblem 6, chapter 19 Ilia route, click to show]Chapter 19A
Really don't want to play this one. It's a fog of war map with snow and a half dozen ballistae. That's terrible. But yeah, the plot is something about us fighting Sigune, the leader of the Ilian mercs who joined Bern. Sigune's really only fighting us because she thinks that if the Etrurian Army wins, they'll just occupy Ilia in Bern's place. =/
Anyway. Niime joins the map as a level 18 Druid, but more importantly, she comes with several nice items: Flux, Eclipse, Heal, and Physic.
Wolt levels. HP, Spd.
God, fuck this map. Ballistae everywhere, some asshole casting Sleep on my units, and Peg Knights appearing out of the blizzard to attack.
Oh FUCK YOU game. Casting Sleep on Clarine?! That's a DICK move.
Alan levels. Str. ._.
Geese levels. HP, Spd, Def.
Dieck levels. HP, Skl, Spd, Def.
Clarine levels. HP, Magic, Skl, Luk, Res. God I love this ****ing Valkyrie.
Lance levels. Skl, Spd, Res.
Thany levels. HP, Str, Luk.
Wolt levels. Str, Skl, Spd, Luk. Nice.
Wolt takes down the boss.
Sigune: ...Well, well... So I'm the one... to die... But maybe... I had already died... a long time... ago...
YOU WERE ONLY STRIKING AT AIR
Sophia levels. HP, Magic, Skl, Spd, Res. There may be hope for you yet, Sophia!
Lilina levels. HP. You, on the other hand...
So Roy learns from Guinevere that Zephiel only killed his father because his father tried to kill him first. classic eliwood not telling roywood about that. seriously how much of FE7 is even known to Roy? Did Eliwood just keep it all a secret or something? Also, Roy sent a letter to Bishop Yodel of the St. Elimine Church, telling him everything he learned from Niime about the Dragons. Not sure why but I assume it'll be important later.
Kenri: Miledy: HELP CLARINE THEY'RE USING ECLIPSE
xp1337: Clarine: Look directly into it! [/spoiler]
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
We're heading to Zealot's Castle, the base of operations for Ilian mercs. Wait, Zealot has a castle? Huh. I thought he was just some dude. Anyway, because Zealot was gone, Murdock took over here. But then Murdock left, so now Roartz is in charge. And we're gonna destroy him.
...why would they give an Elysian Whip to an archer that's completely inaccessible? it's not like you can steal it. fuckin' stupid, that's what that is. Note: I would realize later that you're supposed to use the Warp Staff, but fuck that.
...
Okay. I am back, like... two weeks later or something. Let's see where this takes us. I need to win within 25 turns, get like 12 chests, and recruit Yuno, a FalcoKnight. The plot is that Roartz has been sending letters all over asking for reinforcements but getting jack squat in terms of replies. lol, politics.
Rutger levels. HP, Spd, Luk.
rutger why are you getting hit
Alan levels. HP, Spd.
Lance levels. HP, Str, Skl, Spd.
Wow. In terms of getting hit with ranged attacks, that went about as badly as it could POSSIBLY have gone. First Chad got put to sleep, then Clarine Restored him, then Chad AND Clarine got put to sleep on the same turn, then my characters got nuked with ballistae and ranged magic, while NOBODY dodged.
Okay, let's try this again.
Wow, Lance gets hit down to 7 HP because of some asshole knight with... a Horseslayer, I assume, I dunno, Lance killed him so I can't check. But then Lance came through and dodged about 6 attacks and survived.
Lance levels. Str, Skl, Spd.
Geese levels. Luk. I swear to god, this guy must be cursed. there is no other excuse.
...and I just left Chad in Killing Edge range. what could possibly go wrong.
Chad LIVES! Incredible. I was not expecting that.
Rutger levels. HP, Str, Skl.
Wolt levels. HP, Str, Skl. Well-deserved level, taking out that Killer Ballista with a Long Bow. **** yeah, Wolt.
.......While Rutger and Dieck were fending off an entire half of the enemy forces, Berserker Druid berserked 1 Wolt. That's as many as 4 Roys. And that's terrible.
Dieck levels. HP, Skl, Luk.
Okay, turn 10, the enemy has been routed, Chad is going to town on the chests... Turn 11, Yuno recruited by Thany.
Some thieves show up. Sophia! Delicious thieves!
...where the fuck are you going GET BACK HERE SO SOPHIA CAN EAT YOU
Okay fine, Thany, your new job is to take out those thieves. ...And those
Thany levels. HP, Str.
Alan levels. HP, Skl, Spd, Luk.
*thieves open door*
*see Alan and Lance*
*instant 180*
smart thieves
Thany levels. Luk, Def.
Clarine, Lilina, and Geese combine forces to overpower the boss. It's pretty awful when I'm weapon triangling it up and can still only manage a 50% hit rate. I know axes were kinda overpowered in FE7/8, but they just SUCK here.
...Why did I send Thany into the arena with only half HP? Why? WHY?!
Because I could. *sunglasses*
Thany levels. HP, Spd, Luk.
Sophia levels. HP, Res.
Thany levels. Luk, Res.
Roartz dies the way he lived. A coward.
So, basically, that chapter went great... first attempt aside. Got all the treasure, stole both the gems, killed every enemy except for one sniper that's literally impossible to hit outside of Bolting etc, sent Thany to the arena and didn't even have to use save states! And because I didn't let any NPCs die, I got an Angelic Robe. And because I finished within 25 turns, and Thany, Zealot, Thite, and Yuno are all alive, I'm goin' to the gaiden chapter.
also sophia ate a thief and it was delicious :3
Kenri: Miledy: ...Is somebody cooking horse? Because it smells like somebody is cooking horse.
xp1337: Clarine: You know, Miciaiah is an awful character, but she was on to something that whole "oil" thing. Can we try that here?
Kenri: Miledy: ...we're pan-frying the horse in a little olive oil now?
xp1337: Clarine: yeah miledy that's exactly what we're doing
xp1337: Clarine: ...push her in myself [/spoiler]
[Spoiler for Fire Emblem 6, chapter 20 gaiden Ilia route, click to show]Chapter 20A Gaiden
...why would they do this to me
I think one of the bonus dungeons in FE8 has a map a lot like this. Basically, it's a bunch of little rooms that you can only get to by breaking down walls. Also, your party is split into three groups. Terrible.
So the enemy leader, Treck (wait, isn't one of my guys named Treck? is this like a common name in Elibe or something?), says that his basic strategy is going to be defending until Roy gets frustrated and leaves. Wow. That's almost a good strategy, actually. I mean, I certainly want to leave right now!
Elphin says that these ruins hold Marte, the Lance of Snow and Ice, used by Barigan the 'Faithful' during the Scouring. Barigan, you say? why would he need a lance when his death breath could beat everyone
Anyway, my teams are:
TEAM STRIKE FORCE
Lance
Alan
Lilina
TEAM DELTA WAVE
Thany
Dieck
Clarine
TEAM OTHER GUYS
Roy
Lalum
Miledy
Rutger
Sophia
Wolt
Geese
Lilina levels. HP, Magic, Skl, Luk. Unfortunately, in the process Lilina took about a zillion damage, and uh. She's my healer for that team, and she can't heal herself. Not good.
........Welp, that's game over. Lance just got berserked.
...Hrm. I can't help but think this would go better if I had more Restore staves, or more than one unit capable of using them.
Rutger levels. Skl, Spd.
Geese levels. HP.
Wolt levels. HP, Str, Spd.
Miledy levels. Skl, Luk.
...Yep, Alan gets killed by berserked Lance. So basically, this whole chapter is going to come down to plain old luck. I might as well not even do anything the first three turns.
Actually, scratch that. I'll lure both status druids to target Thany, so Clarine can just Restore her if things go wrong. The odds slightly tip in my favor. Unless Clarine gets Sleep'd.
Rutger levels. HP, Spd. Might've been Skl.
Geese levels. HP, Str, and his very first point of Res! Amazing.
Wolt levels. HP, Str, Skl, Def. Nice.
...Huh. Clarine got berserked. I... was not expecting that. This actually isn't as bad as it could be, though, because Thany grabbed Dieck and ran the fuck away. Then Clarine got distracted by some archers and decided to pick them off.
Miledy levels. HP, Str, Def.
Clarine kills enough enemies while berserked to level. Skl, Luk, Def, Res. ...<_<
...Huh okay that could be a problem. Dieck and Thany ran out of places to run before Clarine's berserk status wore off.
Thany: *breaks down wall* You go on ahead! I'll hold her off!
Dieck: k.
Thany: ...What, no objections?
Dieck: You've got like 13 Res and a trillion avoid! You won't "hold her off", you'll just sit there and she'll miss you repeatedly!
ahahahahaha Clarine decides to take on an opponent she can actually hit instead, aka a random sniper. Then her only Fire tome breaks. I love it when a plan comes together.
Rutger levels because Geese is a fuck up and can't even kill a stupid sniper. Skl.
At this rate, Team Other Guys is going to rout the enemy before the other two teams even make it through the outer walls. <_<
i finally get to have my revenge on the stupid status druids
I'm going to feed that Warrior to Sophia. :3 Oh no you don't. Get back here. om nom nom
Sophia levels. HP. These characters. I feed you a Warrior and this is what you give me in return.
Lilina levels. Magic, Skl, Spd.
Geese levels. HP, Luk, Def. classic geesewood
We get Malte (also known as Marte at the beginning of the chapter - looks like this translation patch was created by... *sunglasses* Unintelligent Systems). Roy learns the whole story from Guinevere about how what's his face, the previous king, tried to kill Zephiel, and then Zephiel killed him, and since then Zephiel has been evil and blah blah blah we all know this already and don't care. Roy's next move is a direct assault on Bern. [/spoiler]
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
We're fighting Murdock. It's a problem.
18 deploys? holy crap. no way am I using all those.
Yodel joins me on turn 1. He has the Miurge, a bow and one of the Divine Weapons, and Holy Maiden, which... I don't think is technically a Divine Weapon. He's also a level 20 Bishop. He says that this is the greatest threat mankind has ever faced since the Dragon-Human Wars (suck it Nergal). He also believes that Hartmut never killed the Dark Dragon, but merely sealed it away, and that Bern has broken that seal. Further, he believes that the Dark Priestess who is always by Zephiel's side is the Dark Dragon (durrrrrrrrrrrr). He thinks that we can only defeat her if we can obtain the Sword of Seals.
Okay, this chapter has a limit of 30 turns if I want to get to the Gaiden chapter. I don't anticipate this being a problem, but it might be.
Rutger levels. HP, Skl, Res.
Alan levels. HP, Str, Spd, Def.
Miledy levels. HP, Skl, Spd, Def.
Lance levels. HP, Str, Skl.
Geese levels. HP. classic geesewood
Dieck levels. Str, Spd.
Sophia levels. HP, Magic, Spd, Def.
Thany levels. HP, Spd, Luk.
Wolt levels. Str, Skl, Spd.
Lance levels. Spd. Well, they can't all be winners.
...Coming up next on Can They Survive?, we find out how many wyverns Thany can survive while carrying Chad!
.......Turns out, Thany's not in danger. It's Geesewood that's in danger. classic geesewood getting killed by wyverns despite WTA. *sigh* Reset. Although my last save state was pretty recent so eh.
Okay, I've been trying too hard not to die to explain how this chapter works. Picture Cog of Destiny, but with a lot fewer enemies initially, but then ~10 reinforcements each turn. I split my party into two. Alpha Team is Wolt, Alan, Clarine, Lance, Rutger, Lilina. Beta Team is Thany, Dieck, Sophia, and Geese. Gamma Team is Miledy. Delta Team is Merlinus, Roy, and Yodel. Epsilon Team is Chad. Delta Team is going with Alpha Team, and Epsilon Team actually included Thany for a while, until I needed to have her drop Chad and go help Beta Team. (You are writing all this down, right?)
Alpha Team is going south to confront the enemy's main forces. Beta is heading east to confront their secondary forces. Miledy is heading southeast to confront their tertiary forces and get a village. After getting the village, Miledy merged with the Alpha Team.
It hasn't been unusual for my teams to have to take on 10+ enemies each turn. It's nuts.
Wolt, Clarine, Alan, Lance, Rutger! Set up a safety dance and tighten that perimeter until it holds! Just call it... the last of the last of the last stands.
Clarine levels. Magic, Luk, Def.
All right guys, this is the last hurrah.
Before Roy, there was Eliwood.
Before the heroes, there were MERCENARIES.
Our influence stopped the Wyverns!
But before that, WE HELD THE LINE.
Our influence stopped the Paladins!
But before that, WE HELD THE LINE.
Our influence WILL stop the reinforcements.
In the coming battle, WE. WILL HOLD. THE LINE!
Lance levels. HP, Skl, Spd, Res.
Alan levels. HP, Str, Res.
Geese levels. HP, Def.
Sophia levels. HP, Magic, Spd, Res.
Miledy levels. HP, Str, Spd.
Lilina levels. HP.
......sigh. Lilina. YOU WERE ON A FOREST. god damn you. those were good levels, too. save state go! This time, full offense.
Rutger levels. HP, Str, Skl, Luk, Def, Res. ........This is acceptable.
Miledy levels. HP, Skl.
Dieck levels. Str.
Geese levels. HP, Skl, Spd, Def.
Sophia levels. HP, Magic, Res.
Lilina levels. Skl.
Clarine levels. HP, Luk, Res.
oh god i provoked the reinforcements. Gale and a bunch of wyverns from three different locations on the map. and i left yodel alone at the top of the map.
okay. I can handle this.
Chad levels. HP, Str, Res.
can't believe he survived that. (four wyverns appeared RIGHT NEXT to the secret shop/Chad and all moved and attacked him before I could do anything)
finish buying items. I got like... 7 or 8 Boots, two Energy Rings, and one Talisman.
okay, send Miledy to rescue Yodel. Thany grabs Chad and gets the heck outta dodge. And now we've gotta charge the boss.
Lilina levels. Luk.
..................asdfghjklasdfghjklasdfghjkl HOW DOES MILEDY GET KILLED
Rutger levels. HP, Str, Def.
Lilina levels. Res.
...........................this attempt could not POSSIBLY be going any worse
The only good news is that Gale and his troops don't seem to actually attack anyone.
It's right around here that I just tune the fuck out and focus on surviving rather than keeping track of what order things happen in. I got the following levels:
Wolt levels. HP, Str, Skl.
Lance levels. HP, Str, Spd, Def, Res.
Miledy levels. HP, Str.
Alan levels. Skl, Def, Res.
Sophia levels. HP, Magic, Skl, Luk, Def, Res.
Clarine levels. HP, Skl, Def, Res.
...but I'm not sure exactly when. Basically, I sent Rutger, Lance, and Alan to handle about 12 reinforcements from the south. Rutger burned through a Wyrmslayer and most of a Killing Edge. This was acceptable. (I might really, really need that Wyrmslayer later, but eh.)
I also formed a cluster with Thany, Clarine, and Wolt. Clarine broke her only tome, but this drew more enemies to her, so that worked out well. Eventually, Miledy retreated back to Clarine for healing and to join the cluster. Geese also joined from the south. Chad is actually my MVP here; he sat on a mountain and never got hit.
Meanwhile, I gave Lilina a Bolting tome and sent her to work on Murdock. My thought process here was that, if reinforcements kept coming, I would lose. On every front. It wouldn't be a "one character dies and I restart" loss, it would be a "Bern completely routs me and destroys my entire team" loss. I thought my only chance was to blast Murdock to death with Bolting. She completely failed. But reinforcements stopped anyway. That was me being ridiculously lucky. In fact, my whole victory here was based on luck and evil. But yeah, even though Lilina failed, Sophia and Dieck went on a crazy suicide mission and managed to take down Murdock.
Dieck levels. HP, Def.
Dieck levels. HP.
.....................that is acceptable, if such a thing must be.
okay, took the throne on turn 29. Wooooow. That was a crazy chapter.
For the record, Murdock had a Knight Crest on him, but I simply didn't have the time or energy to steal it. It's only worth 5000g anyway. Also, I didn't kill Gale because I'm not a jerk - I dunno what effect this has on the story, if any.
...Okay, I looked it up. If you send Miledy to Gale, you can talk to him. He apologizes to her, says he wishes he had met her in a more peaceful time, and then leaves the battlefield (or sticks around as does nothing, as I would learn later). Zeiss gets the generic, "come at me with all your resolve!" speech. If you kill Gale, nothing of note happens. So yeah, I think my choice to not interact with him at all was the correct one. [/spoiler]
[Spoiler for Fire Emblem 6, chapter 21 gaiden, click to show]Chapter 21 Gaiden
We're heading into the Shrine of Seals; you can only come here if you finish within 30 turns and have Zeiss and Miledy both alive, because they're apparently the only ones who know the location of this shrine, being from Bern... or something, I dunno, it doesn't make much sense to me. Also we think that there's something else here besides the Sword of Seals. huh.
Miledy informs us that Bern placed a spellbook here to defend the Sword of Seals. ...Huh. Not, like, armed guards; just a spellbook, apparently.
I want to recruit that spellbook. Not as an item; as a unit.
Oh, okay. It's the Silencing Darkness, Apocalypse, the tome used by Bramimond. NOW it makes sense. Miledy also says the temple has traps all over the place that we can't possibly know the location of. She says thieves would have a better chance of finding them, but like hell am I bringing Chad to a fog of war chapter where the only items in chests are Elixirs. Not dissing Elixirs, but I have plenty.
Rutger levels. HP, Spd, Luk.
Sophia levels. HP, Spd.
Wolt levels. Str, Luk.
Welp, Lilina got Silenced. I'd be more upset about that, but really, she's just here as a healer, and also, I'm just glad it wasn't berserk. God.
I need to mention this because he's probably the least hyped up member of my party, but: holy crap, Wolt is an awesome character. He has 3 more Str than Geese and 5 more than Dieck. In fact, he's behind Lilina (-7), Miledy (-1), and Lance (-2), and that might be it. By now he's skilled enough to actually hit with a Long Bow, which is incredibly useful. He can also dodge everything better than just about everyone else in my party, and his defenses and HP are as high as my Paladins', so he can even take hits if necessary. Basically, he is a HUGE credit to the team, he's just a boring character, so I don't mention him very often. But yeah, props to you, buddy.
XD Lance triggered a crazy blade from a wall trap, but then... TWANG! no damage. hilarious.
Dieck levels. HP, Spd, Luk. Please get Str, Dieck. I am begging you. Please get Str.
Lance levels. Res. I'd be more upset with you, but you've already maxed Str and Spd. So yeah.
Sophia levels. Magic, Luk.
Lance levels. HP, Res.
Geese levels. Str, Spd, Luk, Def. classic geesewo- wait, what?!
Killed the boss. lol magic users as bosses. Though this guy had Nosferatu, which at least made him KINDA annoying. I could go and take the other path around the level and wipe out the ten remaining enemies, but... no, I don't care enough. laterz.
Elphin: Bramimond, the most mysterious of the Eight Heroes, used it [Apocalypse].
By "mysterious", you mean "awesome", right?
Elphin: We don't even know if Bramimond is male or female, old or young. None of the old scrolls say anything specific about Bramimond.
"They do, however, list his stat growths, and wow, they are nuts. We're talking Myrrh and Nino's stat growths combined, here."
You got Apocalypse!
sophia is going to use this to eat so many people :3
Roy uses the Fire Emblem to draw the Sword of Seals, and somehow taps into Hartmut's memories. He sees a beautiful young girl with eyes of two different colors... and then she's gone.
I've been waiting for this for so long... I think I might cry.
Roy promotes to Master Lord. HP +4, Str +2, Skl +3, Spd +2, Def +2, Res +5, Con +2. [/spoiler]
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
Woooooow. This map. This is a map, all right. We're assaulting the King's Castle.
...Okay, yeah, I don't like this map AT ALL. I don't know why I'm trying to do this on so little sleep, but oh well. (By the way, it is... December 7th as I write this. By the time I actually post it, it'll probably be sometime in March? So HELLO MARCH KENRI, from the past.) (ahahahahaha I was so fucking optimistic with that prediction)
...It would really, really behoove me to have multiple characters capable of using Restore staves. AUGH, Berserker Druids.
Wait hold on. I'm allowed 16 characters? Fuck yeah! Yodel! Suit up, you've been promoted to the A-Team. ...No, not that A-Team NOW QUIT FOOLING AROUND
Okay, role call!
ROY THE MASTER LORD!
LILINA THE SAGE!
SNIPER WOLT!
GEESE THE BA SA KA!
DIECK THE HERO!
ALAN AND LANCE, THE DYNAMIC PALADIN DUO!
RUTGER THE SWORDMASTER!
SOPHIA THE EXTREMELY :3 DRUID!
MILEDY THE WYVERN LORD!
THANY THE FALCOKNIGHT!
CLARINE THE VALKYRIE!
LALUM THE DANCER!
CHAD THE THIEF!
MERLINUS THE CARAVAN!
YODEL!
LET'S ROCK AND ROLL!
(for the record, I'm bringing Chad as Berserk bait. That's really the only reason. I mean, there are chests, but yeah.)
Zephiel sends Brenya away with Idoun - the Dark Priestess - before the battle starts, saying that even if he falls here, his plan must succeed.
All right, now let's- oh right i forgot to rearrange my units on the map ahahahaha
Okay NOW let's go.
Roy levels. HP, Skl, Luk.
Lilina levels. Luk, Def. ...I'll actually take that because her Def is awful. Spd would be better, though. Or maybe Skl.
Roy levels. HP, Str, Spd, Def.
By the way, yes, I am using the Sword of Seals. A) Because it's so ridiculous, it's just hilarious. And B) because Roy is a jobber otherwise, and would be a jobber even if he wasn't 10 levels behind the rest of my party.
Roy levels. Str, Luk. More importantly, he leveled from one-shotting a level 15 Hero. Dear god, the Sword of Seals is awesome.
Alan levels. HP, Spd, Luk. Still the lame half of the Alan/Lance duo, but they're still arguably my two best units, so eh.
Geese levels. Def. GOD DAMN YOU GEESEWOOD.
Roy levels. Str, Skl.
Sophia levels. Spd. damn you sophia
Roy levels. HP, Skl, Res.
Wolt levels. Str, Skl, Luk, Def. Amazing. Wolt singlehandedly trying to save this from being a terrible level up chapter. Oh wait, this is FE6, every chapter is a terrible level up chapter. Ah, well. Good effort, Wolt.
Miledy levels. HP, Luk.
Roy levels. HP, Str, Def.
So, up til now, this chapter has actually been remarkably simple and easy. My units basically had no trouble at all. However, that's all about to change...
We open the path to the throne room by sitting two units on the two pressure plates on opposite sides of the map while Roy is standing in front of the gate with the Fire Emblem raised. I chose Rutger and Geese to do this; Geese because he's a jobber, and Rutger because I trusted him the most to not die if reinforcements showed up near his position.
Zephiel: o look its the lycia stinkers he roy get over here so i can beated you that well make 763 heros beated
Roy: No, we're not doing this.
Zephiel: Fine. So, Roy, now that you're here, I'll explain my entire evil plan to you.
Roy: Wait! *runs off*
Zephiel: what.
Roy: *returns with popcorn* These are always gold. Okay, I'm ready.
Zephiel: Humanity was wrong to claim this world from the Dragons. Emotions like hatred and greed drive humans to be hatefilled and greedy. So my solution is as simple as it is complex. I'll just kill everybody.
Roy: ...Pfffffffffffffahahahaha. Oh god. I wasn't ready.
Zephiel: I'm not finished yet! After all humans are dead, I'll give the world to lobotomized dragons who exist solely to wage war. Then everything will be peaceful.
Roy: PfffffffffffffffffffAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Zephiel: Okay, I think we're done here.
Roy: Ahahahahaa... Sorry, sorry, one sec, I just... AHAHAHAHAHAHA AND YOU ACTUALLY LOOKED SO SERIOUS AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Zephiel: Yeah, we're gonna do that final battle thing whenever you're ready.
Roy: Ahahahaha. Ahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaa... Haaa. ......Whew. Okay, yeah, let's do this.
...Oh wow, opening the inner chamber triggered eight reinforcements - four from the SE corner and four from the SW corner. Alan and Lance changed their route to face the ones in the SW corner, while Sophia and Yodel went after the ones in the SE corner. Well, technically, Yodel just Restored Rutger, who had fallen asleep, and who then joined Sophia, but eh. Wolt is taking care of reinforcements in the north singlehandedly, because they spawn trapped in little boxes and unable to move (but very capable of shooting off Sleep at anything nearby).
Meanwhile, Roy, Lilina, Dieck, Thany, and Clarine have been trying to hold off the inner chamber's forces, which include two mamkutes, two heroes, two druids, and four assorted reinforcements each turn. All in all, they did quite well for themselves.
Thany levels. HP, Luk.
Lilina levels. Skl, Luk.
Lance levels. HP, Luk.
Dieck levels. HP, Str, Skl, Spd, Luk. That's like the first good level Dieck has ever gotten.
Roy levels. HP, Luk.
Rutger levels. HP, Spd, Luk, Res. God, that was close. He got hit with Fenrir, and even though I know it can't do 50 damage in a single hit, I was still terrified.
Sophia levels. HP, Skl, Spd, Def.
Clarine levels. Res.
Clarine's FINAL stats:
HP 46 (average 34.2)
Magic 19 (average 16.4)
Skl 20 (average 22.2)
Spd 25 (MAX) (average MAX)
Luk 30 (MAX) (average MAX)
Def 7 (average 7.8)
Res 23 (average 23.2)
Move 8
Con 6
Aid 14
Thunder Affinity
Look at all that Magic and HP. I think I gave her an Angelic Robe, but I think she beats the average by quite a lot even without it. She got a little screwed in Skill, but overall, fantastic unit. A+++++++++ would train again
Roy levels. Str.
All right, it's time. FOR THE SHOWDOWN.
ROY VS. ZEPHIEL!
HEAVEN OR HELL!
LET'S ROCK!
Roy: *miss*
fucking roywood
Zephiel: *hit*
Roy: *crit*
ROYWOOD IS HERE TO KICK ASS AND TAKE NAMES AND HE ALREADY KNOWS ZEPHIEL'S NAME.
Bishop: lol, healin' zephiel
Roy: *hit*
Zephiel: *hit*
Roy: *crit*
ROY'S OUR BOY! ROY'S OUR BOY! and I get no exp for that. fucking zephiel.
Zephiel: wat... ever... i am the king, you people are still... just... the subjects...
Lilina levels. HP. Ugh.
Thany levels. NOTHING. God. Damn. You. Thany. Wait, hold on. .......Okay you've maxed Skl and Spd, fine, you're excused. Once.
Roy levels. HP, Spd, Luk, Res.
Roy levels. HP, Luk.
Geese levels. Str. geesewood and roywood have combined their forces to create woodwood, the eliwoodiest character of them all.
Dieck levels. HP, Spd, Luk.
Roy levels. Str, Skl, Spd, Def.
Roy levels. HP, Skl, Luk, Def, Res.
Not that this EXP isn't delicious om nom nom but I'd really just like to support grind and finish this chapter.
Okay there, reinforcements have finally stopped.
Geese levels. HP, Spd, Luk.
FINALLY. Geese/Lalum A-rank support. These were TERRIBLE support convos, by the way. It was really just me going, "oh crap, who can I pair Geese/Sophia/Lalum/Miledy with" (and it turns out, Geese/Lalum is pretty much the whole of it). But yeah. At least Lalum mentioned a "special dance" in the A-rank support. So THAT's something.
Roy finally takes the throne. Elphin says it's not over because the Dark Priestess got away. Upon examining Exaccus, Zephiel's sword that can only be used by the king of Bern, all the Divine Weapons start glowing. Turns out Exaccus is a Divine Weapon, used by Hartmut, and the Sword of Seals is something else entirely, possibly even more powerful. Hey, I'd believe it. Anyway, the legends say that when all the Divine Weapons are together, the Dragon's Temple rises out of the ground. We think the Dark Priestess is there. [/spoiler]
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
DATKEESE - 64
YOU HAVE AN AMAZING WISDOM AND POWER.
END OF
"THE LEGEND OF ZELDA 1"
well, that made all of loz1's second quest worth it, right there. you heard them, i have an amazing wisdom and power. just one though. maybe i'd get more if i had died less than 64 times.
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
That game starts off as complete and utter bullshit, then becomes progressively less bullshit as you go. The second palace is probably the most bullshit of the entire game, if only because you have to trek a long ****ing way to get back to it every time because you don't have the Hammer yet.
In Palace 5, I used an EXP trick to get all my stats to max (thanks, Epyon!) and after that the entire game is basically a breeze until the final level.
The Great Palace is a bitch and a half to get to, but luckily at this point the sensible devs managed to lock the very, very stupid ones in a closet, and made it so you respawn at the start of the dungeon when you game over. What a ****ing good design choice, I sure do wish it had worked like that for EVERY DUNGEON. The final two bosses are basically pushovers, but then I didn't really have a problem with any of the bosses in this game. I also used cheap tricks to kill both of the final bosses, because fuck redoing that entire dungeon. But whatever. If I didn't use cheap tricks I wouldn't be Kenri.
Overall, the game's biggest issue is that the combat (and platforming) are so god awful that every single death feels unfair. Every single death, and I died about 100 times. Half the time the hit detection doesn't work, so you just find yourself hoping it doesn't work in your favor (effectively doubling the length of your
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Provisional
You started fucking up right here.
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LMAO he ain't my lover I'm not into guys -Tengu
Editor
i admit it was not my smartest decision
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"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Provisional
---
LMAO he ain't my lover I'm not into guys -Tengu
Editor
Anyway, in FE6 news, time for a really, really easy chapter (unless you're livestreaming it, apparently).
[Spoiler for Fire Emblem 6, chapter 23, click to show]Chapter 23
So, the way this works is, the game would be over by now, but I went to all the gaiden chapters and got all the Divine Weapons, and didn't break any of them, so now I can do the last few chapters and get the true end.
Bern surrenders after Zephiel's death, but Brenya awaits Roy outside the Dragon's Temple with the remnants of Bern's army.
.......And it turns out the remnants of Bern's army are entirely composed of the 53rd Regiment, also known as the Dozens of Wyvern Knights, and Fuck You Too Division. Worse, I need to get THE BEST CHARACTER IN THE GAME, and to do that, I need to bring Fir along. Fir. The level 1 Myrmidon. God. Damn. It.
Brenya: Our chances of winning are not high. But we are the Bern Army, the strongest force on the continent. We shall at least show them our unbending will.
=/
Yeah. They're not gonna surrender. Stupid bad guys and their stupid pride. Ah well. At least we offered.
FYI, there are a couple things to steal on this map, gems and a Guiding Ring which is LIKE a gem because all I'd do is sell it, but fuck you if you think I'm bringing Chad to this map. I don't fucking think so, no thank you.
Thany levels. Luk, Res.
I sent Thany on a dangerous suicide mission. She needs to contend with three ballistae and at least four wyverns with assorted weapons. Yeah. That may be a problem.
Wolt levels. HP, Skl, Def.
Fir goes to the village and recruits THE BEST CHARACTER IN THE GAME.
SAY HELLO TO THE SAINT OF SWORDS, KAREL!
(He has mellowed out considerably since FE7, being a pacifist now, even. And his growth rates are Bramimond-esque. Better, even.)
.......huh. Thany was just put to sleep, and is surrounded by wyverns. This could end badly. In fact, yeah, I'm not gonna risk that. Rescue Staff go.
Lilina levels. Skl, Luk.
Thany levels. Res.
Geese levels. HP, Str, Luk. I actually consider that a very successful level for Geesewood here, which shows you just how low my standards are.
Dieck levels. HP, Str, Skl, Luk. Almost got as much Strength as Rutger now, Dieck. Almost.
Roy levels. Str, Res.
Sophia levels. Magic, Skl, Spd, Res.
...oh wow Brenya has Bolting HOW THE FUCK DID I NOT REALIZE THAT. Luckily, she targeted Wolt, who dodged. (also, for being one of the Three Dragon Lords, she sure isn't a Dragon Lord... like, at all. Sages =/= Dragon Lords, it's really not even close.)
So yeah, killed Brenya, very sad, killed everything else on the map (which was really just a lone mamkute, I was pretty thorough, all things considered). This chapter was actually way more straightforward than it looked. The only mistake I made was FORGETTING MY SILVER CARD AUGH. Oh well.
We are now moving deeper within the Dragon's Temple. Elphin says that according to legends, which are always true, this temple powers up the dragons within it. So, our usual tactics (blast them with magic and/or one-shot them with the Sword of Seals) might not work. Thus, we may have to depend on our Divine Weapons, and we should only bring people who can use them.
...god, I really hope I'm not limited to like 8 units, one per weapon. That would be awful. [/spoiler]
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
Fun
adj.
Not fun.
THAT IS ALL.
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Liberal Arts Major
<->
"What the fuck is Alice doing in Wonderland anyway? Who the fuck told her she could leave the god damn kitchen in the first place?" -Random guy on Xbox Live
http://www.backloggery.com/kodan882
Advanced
I personally think RoTTK would be much better anyhow, since there's no real penalty other than paying extra wages. Greedy officers >_>
---
"But friends, i ask you. What is a GameCobra? From where does it come? Who are it's people?" - A Random Day on World of Warcraft
Editor
-this is some "wonderful" "voice" "acting"
-"I am your judgement."
you can't even spell judgment.
-i wanted to name the main character neku sakuraba but it wouldn't fit :x
actually considering how his headphones are cat ears, neko sakuraba would be more appropriate
-Oh good, it's the Baten Kaitos system of "just skip over the main character's name during voice work". Just as natural and never awkward as it was in that game!
-We get some Shintendo CPs (made by Iwaka and Miyomata).
-why are characters in horror-esque stories always so ****ing stupid? that email is telling us the future. there's no way that's NOT what it's doing. what about this is not suspicious in every way.
-I HAVE SLAIN THE EVIL VOICE ACTING
LET A NEW ERA OF PROSPERITY COME TO THE LAND OF DEVIL SURVIVOR
-i try to go to aoyama but it won't let me advance the plot there, so i go somewhere else
-oh look it's Team Plasma
...
let's leave expeditiously
-yuzu. i tried to go investigate aoyama BEFORE the man was supposed to die. you can't seriously suggest we go do now that the attack has already happened, can you?
...
this is gonna be a long game
-"The email was a warning."
"I see. You're saying I sent you the email, then carried out the murder blah blah blah random bullshit that wasn't at all what that dialogue choice implied, it's like you're really playing Mass Effect, isn't it?"
-dude, naoya, we're cousins. you can't pull this "mysterious stranger" BS with me.
now give me a straight answer before i kick you in the dick.
-...atsuro. this isn't some thing you can explain away as a coincidence or a prank. how often do people in apartment buildings in japan get eaten by carnivorous animals for you to suggest "herpaderp, must be a coincidence" with a straight face?
-LOL YUZU IS A GIRL SO SHE CANNOT UNDERSTAND SIMPLE TECHNOLOGICAL CONCEPTS LIKE "WIRELESS COMMUNICATIONS"
-Welcome back to Let's Survive Devil Survivor, this is Kenri and I'm here with...
"MyNameIsYuzu!"
"And I'm just Atsuro."
-"Our attacks work against them?! Could it be... because of the COMPs?!"
...what. but.
...
atsuro i have a rock that keeps tigers away
as long as i have owned it i have never been attacked by any tigers
would you like to buy my rock
-starting to get the hang of this battle system
-i like how we didn't remember that the cemetary was going to explode until AFTER we went there
-WENDIGOMON, WE MEET AGAIN
-Amane blasts Wendigo with extreme prejudice, but he has Battle Continuation so survives with 1 HP. And then Amane leaves. What a bitch.
-dammit yuzu you are the worst party member
as soon as i get control back i'm giving you kobold and myself pixie
i don't trust you unless you have a big tough man nearby to protect you at all times
-one free battle later, giving yuzu kasubo instead AND ALSO BUYING HER AN OGRE because DAMMIT YUZU
-I'm still not really sure how these JSDF barricades work. It's a city. You can't just ****in' barricade everything.
-We see Naoya but get attacked by demons when we try to chase him! They're tougher than the av-er-age demons but now that Yuzu isn't useless it isn't so bad.
-Need to start conserving my MP. That battle could have been hairy if it had gone on much longer. [/spoiler]
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Editor
[Spoiler for Devil Survivor Overclocked, click to show]-SKILL CRACK ACTIVATE! Ability to steal enemy skills! One more way for me to
sabotage myself by forgetting which character was supposed to kill which enemy,
even though it's displayed prominently on the top screen! YES. THE BEST. I AM
AMAZING AT SRPGS.
-i hate everyone in my party.
when you receive emails that you have conclusively proven PREDICT THE FUTURE,
you make a point to MEMORIZE THEIR CONTENTS. stop going to places and then
being surprised later when you remember the email said something would happen
there!
-a wendigo is not a snowman
"it's an abominable-"
IT ISN'T THAT KIND OF SNOWMAN EITHER
-oh god, the wendigo isn't even the scariest thing here! that damn team of
three wairas...
-never mind, now that i have a not-awful team the wendigo is definitely the
scariest thing there
-speaking of which, where the fuck is Amane? i thought she was tracking down
wendigo to kill it
-despite that, managed to kill Wendigo with Yuzu, giving her a "fuck
everything" spell (2-5 Ice element attacks) to bust out whenever she's in a
tight spot. Sadly it takes a LOT of MP, but eh.
-our COMPs are almost out of batteries but we find a portable charger! and also
learn some plot exposition that the player already figured out ages ago
-A "Free battle (hard)" becomes available. I SMELL A CHALLENGE
-I SMELL A CHALLENGE THAT I CAN MAKE EVEN HARDER BY ACCIDENTALLY ENDING MY
CHARACTER'S TURN WITHOUT ATTACKING
I AM THE BEST AT SRPGS
-that.
that wasn't very hard at all.
-Welcome back to Let's Save Haru, I'm Kenri and... who am I here with?
"MyNameIsYuzu!"
"And I'm just Atsuro."
-she takes two attacks but survives and then we rescue her. Devil Speed the
best.
-"Huh?! You can summon demons too, Haru?"
Yuzu participates in class but she does not PAY ATTENTION
-haru stop hitting on me
i'm pretty sure yuzu wants to jump your bones and i'm a firm believer in pros
before hos
(yuzu has been a pro ever since she killed that wendigo)
-oh yay, a battle with demon-summoning COMPs
luckily i destroyed them all before they could summon any extra enemies to ruin
my day
is there any game reinforcements won't make worse?
-so... you see COMPs on the ground, summoning demons that fight random
passers-by, and your first thought is that people like us were killed and
dropped them?
what about the much more likely scenario of someone setting them up just to
dick with us?
-WHAT IS A CLIENT
WHAT IS A SERVER
HELP
I AM YUZU
I'M JUST SUCH A GIRL
HELP HOW DO I BREATHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
-stuff happens. we run around searching for an exit and meet a bunch of people
who will probably die horribly later on to designate the exact point at which
shit has officially become real.
-we fight some thugs with COMPs. human enemies? my race-d and race-o skills
will finally be not-useless.
-god i love atsuro. not his character, god no, but the way i play him and his team.
1. Devil Speed
2. RUN UP TO NEAREST ENEMY
3. Aggravate
4. PUNCH EVERYTHING
5. EVERYTHING
6. EVERY GODDAMN THING
7. GO TO 4
-wait. wait wait wait. you can reassign skills. they don't have to go to the
person who cracked them.
...
i am an idiot.
-shoji you are the best reporter.
marry me.
-we kill some demons who got ahold of COMPs and were planning on summoning
their master, Beldr (clearly summoning a god who is beloved by everyone in
existence except for some dick named loki is the best way to destroy the world)
-oh. it's some corrupt military dudes who think we're their target because we have COMPs. well then, time to employ the time honored strategy of "run the fuck away"
-...wait. i can fuse demons even if the result is grayed out, so long as the NAME of the result isn't grayed out.
...
i am kenri.
-oh yay, a fight with a bunch of demons, and i get kaido and honda helping me
...
You recall a quote from Frozen Synapse...
"Panarch Collective units will support you."
"By 'support', we mean 'annoy and actively hinder'."
here's what happened:
1) Kaido and Honda immediately set for to ruin my Skill Cracks. Kaido succeeded but I was able to stop Honda, mainly because Honda's worthless.
2) Kaido and Honda got destroyed. Kaido lost all his demons and was dropped to low HP. Honda had to pull back to heal him.
3) My character barely managed to wipe out his side of the battlefield, despite little healing and no Devil Speed.
4) Atsuro bravely charged into the main fray, lost both his demons in glorious combat, and proceeded to barely win anyway, no thanks to ****ing Kaido, my god is that guy useless.
5) Yuzu annihilated her half of the battlefield without getting hurt. By the end she was just running around, picking off reinforcements.
-kaido has the nerve to say that we're pretty good, or that at least we "knew to stay out of his way"
...
THE LIST
Kaido
Naoya
Beldr
those military guys who chased us away at gunpoint
-Yuzu: "Immortal... Does that mean it can't die?!"
I AM YUZU
THE ONLY WORDS I UNDERSTAND ARE "LIKE", "Y'KNOW", AND "WHATEVER"
I'M JUST SUCH A GIRL
(also: no. immortal means it can't die of old age.) [/spoiler]
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Advanced
I approve.
-dude, naoya, we're cousins. you can't pull this "mysterious stranger" BS with me.
he totally can
just you WAIT until a certain line he says later that'll make you wonder whether it's a mistranslation or if the game is really that silly.
-dammit yuzu you are the worst party member
She's one of the best party members, but her 3 move sucks serious fucking balls.
-Need to start conserving my MP. That battle could have been hairy if it had gone on much longer.
In later battles, MP restoration/conservation is extremely essential to victory. Be sure to do that when possible. Also, your MC should be a magic-user. Just to warn you ahead of time. :3
-SKILL CRACK ACTIVATE! Ability to steal enemy skills! One more way for me to
sabotage myself by forgetting which character was supposed to kill which enemy,
Remember too that you can crack even grayed-out skills for later use.
1) Kaido and Honda immediately set for to ruin my Skill Cracks. Kaido succeeded but I was able to stop Honda, mainly because Honda's worthless.
I hate them so much for doing that. Getting some skill cracks with npc "helpers" is way too annoying without certain skills.
2) Kaido and Honda got destroyed. Kaido lost all his demons and was dropped to low HP. Honda had to pull back to heal him.
Kaido outright died on me in my first playthrough. It was amazing.
(also: no. immortal means it can't die of old age.)
and this is why in mythology people hurled weapons at Baldr for lulz.
---
"Because nothing says "level 80 dark elf warlock" like "radical 19th century feminist"!" -Ogordemir99 on World of Wollstonecraft
Editor
Devil Speed is the best thing. Yuzu is never going to not have a demon with Devil Speed, because augh...
In later battles, MP restoration/conservation is extremely essential to victory. Be sure to do that when possible. Also, your MC should be a magic-user. Just to warn you ahead of time. :3
He is one. Well, right now he's sort of even, because I recall you saying something about making sure he had 12 Strength, but after that it's Magic all the way. because magic is a lot better, and not just on the main character.
Remember too that you can crack even grayed-out skills for later use.
this is like the one thing about the game i actually figured out immediately.
---
-we find kaido later and talk to him about the bloodless murders. he says his brother was one of the victims and was found lying on the ground, bleeding from his neck.
his brother.
was one of the victims of the bloodless murders.
and was found bleeding from the neck.
...
****ing kaido
-we find some people being attacked by demons. i'm not sure why generic civilians without COMPs have 100+ HP, but it makes this a lot easier. and so does devil speed, and my character's ability to teleport. a cop tried to help us but we told him to run (well, more accurately we lied and said a demon was attacking the people in the park, so he went that way and a demon followed him, which means we actually fucked up really, really badly, but whatever, we'll just win fast enough to go stop that demon too).
-we win, but we don't make it to the park in time, but amane shows up and summons a demon (that looks like a goddess) and saves everything. and probably converts a lot of people to the shomonkai
-what the. kaido's crushing on ms. mari? the teacher/nurse? dude. first of all, that's creepy. second of all, older women are never worth the trouble. just trust me on this.
-kaido also seems to be implying that mc/yuzu is canon. not sure how i feel about that. i liked it better when we were just bros. ...well, not bros, but uh...
-we rescue keisuke and midori from some demons. keisuke is... suicidal. repeatedly attacks a jack frost party that can nearly one-shot him. I had to surround him with Yuzu, Atsuro, and my character in order to heal him at every possible opportunity. Atsuro barely got to punch anyone in the face at all, it was horrible.
-midori gets a comp, keisuke and midori have their death counts increased to 5, fun times
-keisuke and my character think that the SDF plans to kill everyone in 5 days, which would explain why they don't have death clocks and everyone else is capped at 5.
-Day 3. Today's forecast calls for slightly cloudy skies, light showers, and the summoning of the Immortal Demon Master, Beldr.
-Summary of conversation:
Yuzu: ohmigosh we're in trouble, what're we gonna do?!
MC: Wait for it to show up and then make numbers pop out of its head until it dies?
Yuzu: ...It. Is. IMMORTAL.
MC: THAT WORD DOES NOT MEAN YOU THINK IT MEANS
MC: BESIDES
MC: WE KNOW THE EXACT PLACE AND TIME THAT IT WILL BE SUMMONED
MC: WE CAN JUST GET THERE EARLY AND KILL ANY DEMONS THAT COME BY
Atsuro: no we need to go dick around instead
MC: GOD
-Keisuke shows up. He's worried because Midori's death count dropped to 2 when she decided to use her COMP to help people. We're going to go try to convince her that helping people and fighting demons has never been a good idea, especially when your death clock is really low. oh wait, how does hypocrisy work? it's when you don't tell people not to do things which you yourself do all the time, right?
-keisuke joins the team. yay?
-...but first we're gonna look for a way to escape...? god, you idiots, i fucking hate my entire party.
look
escaping's not gonna help us if beldr is summoned
we need to actually make a point of trying to stop that BEFORE it happens
idiots
-keisuke you are so useless
i mean yes you're getting stuck with the demons who weren't good enough to be used by the a-team (no not that a-team), but still
-oh dear, just got handed my first loss. challenged a free battle (hard) which was actually (hard). part of it was that my team is very garm-dependent and the yuki jyorou enemies here can one-shot garms with their mabufu skill, but ehh... ended up retreating but I would have definitely lost there if I had stuck around
-came back with better demons for keisuke and a better plan of action. smoked 'em.
-the better demons for keisuke i mentioned? one of them is Flaemis, an elemental. it took like 1000 gold (no i'm not calling it macca, fuck you) to fuse. why? who knows. presumably elementals are good, but i haven't noticed it being THAT amazing so far.
-made a very, very, very expensive fusion. had to summon a garm from my compendium and it cost about half of my total munny. fused that with atsuro's bilwis, and then the resulting makara with a waira that i had lying around, to create
why go through all that? because atsuro's battle plan has three steps: 1) Devil Speed, 2) Aggravate, and 3) punch everything. Aggravate is essential, so if I was dropping Bulwis, it needed to be for something else with Aggravate.
-Welcome back to Let's Save Haru, it's episode 2, I'm Kenri and I'm here with...
"MyNameIsYuzu!"
"I'm Keisuke and I don't know what the fuck I'm doing here."
"And I'm just Atsuro."
-yuzu is shocked that haru is being attacked by a group of wendigos, because it means that what was a super-powerful demon just a few days ago is now common.
god, yuzu. is this your first jrpg or something? you might as well ask why the monsters always get tougher the further you get from the hero's hometown (and then wonder why the villagers from that town don't just hire a couple villagers from two towns over to protect them).
-that gozuki is working out just fine, by the way. dealing over 100 damage consistently with normal attacks, I THINK SO
-the wendigos die like vermin before our overwhelming might... except for the party i sent yuzu after, which TPKs her with incredible ease. god, yuzu, what happened to you. i mean you had like no fire attacks but uh...
...
i guess that was really my fault
-NOTE TO SELF: WENDIGOS ARE IMMUNE TO STATUS EFFECTS. STOP USING STATUS EFFECTS ON THEM.
(i am kenri)
-keisuke, on the other hand, solo'd about half of the battlefield, then reinforcements appeared and he killed them too, then he hunted down the wendigo that defeated yuzu's party and narrowly defeated it as well, despite 2/3rds of his party having no MP. yikes.
-i really wish everyone would stop hitting on me. haru wants to chat with me later, so i say yes, which causes yuzu to get all flustered, but i just know that if i had said no she would have yelled at me for being rude or some shit.
Let's just get this out in the open: I hate dialogue choices. Hate them, hate them, hate them. I'm probably going to bitch about them a lot and often if they continue being as bad as they have been so far.
-my character thinks that haru wants to die. absolutely nothing so far has indicated this other than her generally acting very depressed, but he's right, so i'll just assume he's psychic or some shit, i dunno, who cares.
->>Keisuke berates MC for being too eager to help others
>>Keisuke joined our party to get us to help Midori
fucking hate my WHOLE party
-we try the akasaka tunnel again and run into the same SDF chick as before, but we manage to convince her to talk to us. she shouts some typic jrpg dreck about how the hideously evil stuff that's happening is preferable to some alternative that might or might not actually happen and almost certainly wouldn't be as bad as she claims.
-Izuna: Ordinary weaponry can't do anything against demons.
MC: ...Wait.
MC: Wait what.
Izuna: What?
MC: but the blockade is to keep demons in
Izuna: yes
MC: but guns don't work on demons
Izuna: right
MC: ...
MC: ......
MC: SO HOW THE FUCK HAS THE BLOCKADE BEEN WORKING?
Izuna: ...
Izuna: You know, that's a very good question.
MC: FOR FUCK'S SAKE SOME OF THE DEMONS CAN FLY OR TELEPORT
Izuna: um
MC: AND THEN TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE YOU'RE THREATENING US WITH GUNFIRE IF WE TRY TO STOP YOU, BUT WE HAVE DEMONS, AND THUS NOTHING TO FEAR FROM GUNFIRE
Izuna: I could shoot you instead of your demons.
MC: A great plan with only one detail overlooked.
Izuna: What's that?
MC: We have demons that block fatal damage directed towards their leader.
Izuna: ...
Izuna: ......
Izuna: .........
Izuna: fuck
-After receiving a hint that whatever it is that will kill everyone in 4 days will be the government's doing, we're "forced" to leave, by which i mean we leave even though we could take out izuna with little trouble and have absolutely no reason not to
-Keisuke: I doubt there's a way out of the barricade.
MC: it is a city of course there is.
MC: we have demons
MC: we can just blow shit up until we have a way out
Keisuke: no that won't work
MC: Fine, then let's take out the reason for the blockade.
Atsuro: You're not suggesting... that we fight the SDF?!
MC: Bingo.
Keisuke: Stop joking, MC. You should tell them the truth.
MC: I'm not fucking joking! Look around!
[MC points to COMPs.]
MC: DEMONS - HELPING US
[MC points to the tunnel.]
MC: SDF - FUCKING US OVER
MC: I MADE MY CHOICE AND I STAND BY IT
-Keisuke: For now, let's just focus on fighting Beldr.
Atsuro: that is a good idea and i support it
Yuzu: we should have thought of that earlier
MC: ASDFGHJKL
MC: ZXCVBNM
-while chasing after naoya, we run into some guy who hits on yuzu. his death clock is blank and he knows about beldr, so chances are he's a demon himself imo. he says that everything in existence swore not to harm beldr, except one thing, which is, luckily enough, here within the circle.
...
listen.
everything swore not to harm baldr because baldr is a ****ing bro. i still don't buy that this crazy-ass demon lord is actually him. and even if he is, everyone in the party should know that we need mistletoe. this is not a sidequest.
-we find midori protecting some civilians from demons and go to help her!
Keisuke: We must deal with the demons, but we also must reach her and convince her to stop!
...Why?!
HER DEATH CLOCK IS LITERALLY HIGHER THAN OURS
-YES. MOVING KEN NEXT TO MIDORI GIVES A "PERSUADE" COMMAND. DIALOGUE CHOICES:
1. I'll save you!
2. Let's fight together!
SELECTING 2 AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT, FUCK YOU KEISUKE, FUCK YOUUUU
-we flatten all the demons and the civvies escape, but then Beldr shows up even though he was supposed to be summoned at the cemetary. WELP.
-note that there wasn't any build up for that at all. we killed all the demons nearby and then beldr just showed up as a reinforcement. it makes no sense whatsoever. such bad writing.
-he is indeed immune to everything, but I have to attack him before the game will let me run. also he summoned some dudes who i assumed were fodder, but they're actually scarier than beldr is. because they have full parties. yep. and then yuzu died, as is her wont. glad this isn't FE so I don't have to restart.
-god, i was so happy about the dialogue choice earlier, but now i'm right back to being railroaded into talking midori out of fighting demons even though her death clock is larger than ours and she's waaaaaaaay more competent than kaido and honda.
-Midori: I have to run, but you have to fight it?! I'm not listening to you guys anymore! I'm gonna go beat alllll the bad guys!
(that isn't a joke. she actually says that. ONLY SENSIBLE CHARACTER ON-SCREEN RIGHT NOW.)
-Yuzu: Midori, if you hadn't run from that last battle, you could have died.
Midori: ...but my death clock says 1. i can't die today.
Yuzu: ...
Midori: ...
Yuzu: ...
Midori: ...
Yuzu: I AM YUZU I DON'T UNDERSTAND PLOT DEVICES I'M JUST SUCH A GIRL
-Keisuke: Why won't she understand?
BECAUSE SHE'S CORRECT? [/spoiler]
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Advanced
Beldr is the reason I mentioned to get about 12 strength. His only weakness is based on a physical attack so the MC needs to have enough to outdamage his Vampiric Mist horseshit. Plus some good strength does unlock some nice skills later. Oh, and even in a new game+, almighty skills still don't hurt Beldr. What an asshole.[/spoiler]
---
"Because nothing says "level 80 dark elf warlock" like "radical 19th century feminist"!" -Ogordemir99 on World of Wollstonecraft
Editor
[Spoiler for Devil Survivor Overclocked, click to show]->>start a free battle
>>four skills to crack
>>BEST EVER
>>three of the four are on the same enemy
>>GODDAMMIT FUCK YOU
-haru is the eeyore of devil survivor
Haru: Thanks for noticing me.
it works on every level.
-atsuro does some bullshit involving hacking into the COMP using his laptop or something, I dunno, I wasn't paying attention
I AM KENRI
WHAT IS A SERVER
I'M JUST SUCH A GIRL wait what
anyway, he finds out that beldr is invulnerable to everything except "the devil's fugue".
...
so basically, i think what he did was open up the demon compendium, found beldr's entry, right-clicked on it, selected "view source", and it said "source: norse mythology", so he typed "norse mythology" into wikipedia and found the story of baldr. and now he's just bullshitting us.
-i try to tell the party that it's a plant but they ignore me
thanks guys
not like i'm your party leader or anything
-we find midori defending some civilians, so we go to stop her
i need to reiterate just how ridiculous this whole situation is:
"we need to risk our lives for her sake, because if she keeps risking her life for the sake of others, she'll die because her death count is so low. now let's go risk our lives, because that's the best way we've found to increase our death count."
it's like a joke. it's the kind of argument this game would use if it was a parody of itself.
-Back in Shibuya, we hear someone's voice and go to investigate.
this is a thing that actually happens
god knows how much time our group must waste while traversing tokyo
-It's Kaido and Honda. They're taking on a big group of demons. I PRESENT YOU THE FOLLOWING SCENE, COMPLETELY UNEDITED
Kaido: The fuck are you guys doing here? Can't you see we're grinding?
MC: You couldn't grind corn if you had a mortar and pestle. Get out of here and leave this to us before you die.
Kaido: We need Macca. You leave before we decide to take you guys out instead.
Yuzu: You couldn't take out the trash if you were a garbageman. Try us and you'll find yourself on the wrong end of a Skill Crack.
Kaido: How about a wager, then? We'll each bet all our Macca and all our COMPs.
Yuzu: It is on like Donkey Kong!
Honda: Whoa there young lady, that's copywritten.
Yuzu: ...!
Yuzu: We
Yuzu: We'll bring the pain-ia, like Castlevania!
Honda: Better.
MC: Yuzu what have I told you about picking fights with retards?
Yuzu: Only do it if they've messed up our Skill Cracks at some point in the past?
MC: That's exactly right. Nicely done.
[We deploy our party.]
Kaido: Oh right, there are four of you.
MC: Bitch, please.
MC: I'm going to effectively solo this fight.
Kaido: We'll see about that!
[Kaido and Honda move and destroy a Wendigo's party.]
Kaido's Party - 1
MC's Party - 0
MC: Nice, a scripted win. How about this?
[MC teleports, kills an enemy party, moves again with Animal Leg, kills another enemy party on defense. Rest of the party wipes out a straggler.]
Kaido's Party - 1
MC's Party - 3
Kaido: BULL
Kaido: SHIT
MC: Oh, the true bullshit has yet to arrive.
[Reinforcements appear on the second level of the area. Kaido and Honda kill an enemy party and start walking towards the reinforcements.]
Kaido's Party - 2
MC's Party - 3
MC: nope.avi
[MC teleports straight down to the second level, taking a shortcut of about 20 squares. He proceeds to wipe out another enemy group there.]
Kaido's Party - 2
MC's Party - 4
Kaido: ...
MC: So yeah
MC: The thing about being outnumbered
MC: It tends to not matter when your opponents are trash.
MC: Now gtfo.
-Kaido basically forfeits at this point because he literally cannot win, and somehow in his grief summons PAZUZU (yeah i dunno). He makes a contract with Pazuzu and Pazuzu warps Kaido and Honda away. we don't get their macca or their comps, by the way. i know, plot twist, right.
seriously though kaido can go eat a bag of dicks
-we hear about some shomonkai who are antagonizing people to hand over their COMPs, so we go to investigate. yuzu is surprised when they try to take our COMPs.
I AM YUZU
WHAT IS CAUSE AND EFFECT
-After a reset becaused Yuzu screwed up a Skill Crack by dying, we manage to take out enough of the renegade Shomonkai for some real Shomonkai to show up to help. They almost screw up our Skill Cracks AGAIN but luckily they're worthless. Eventually we win.
-Amane thanks us and says that my destiny is about to reach a branching path or something. it's almost like there's no fourth wall at all.
(for the record, I know this game has different paths, but I don't know what all of them are. if Yuzu has one that's what I'm picking (assuming I have a choice) though.)
-We find a guy who knows enough about devil's fugue to tell us that it's mistletoe.
Keisuke: ...Just like you said, MC. The devil's fugue really is a plant.
MC: yes
MC: yes it is
MC: i can't help but notice that you didn't trust me when i said that, but now that a random stranger has agreed with me, you're all convinced
MC: nice to see where i stand with you guys
Keisuke: That's-
MC: i hate you
-we find a guy selling random crap from the woods (how is this a business), and someone gave him mistletoe, but he sold it already. so we're gonna go find the demon tamers who bought it legally and take it from them, because this game is about nothing else if not us preventing anyone else from having powers like ours
-the demon tamers (believers in belial, apparently) are trying to defeat beldr, but only we are allowed to do that. you know, that's why we've dicked around and avoided doing anything about beldr all day.
-we save the demon tamers from the demons that they would have easily killed, then beat them up and break their COMPs, dooming them to die if they ever get attacked by any demons again. and then we steal their mistletoe that they legally purchased.
...
We're heroes!
-the demon tamers act weird and say we know nothing of this battle
so fucking tell us, goddamn
-yuzu wonders how the mistletoe (which is a cellphone charm, not an actual plant - let's play FIND THE PLOT HOLE, i'll reveal it at the end of the writeup) can defeat beldr. keisuke says that common sense doesn't necessarily apply to demons.
or this game, just in general.
-gin warns my character not to get close to haru and then reject her, because she'll probably kill herself if i do.
thanks. thanks, man.
look, i've been trying to be nice to her WITHOUT hitting on her. it's harder than you might think when you only get two dialogue options at a time and neither of them will reliably communicate what they actually say.
-We head to the cemetary, mistletoe in hand, and beldr is summoned.
Beldr: Wassup my tamers! Beldr in the cemetary!
MC: we know
Yuzu: we've met already
Keisuke: you punched my friend
Beldr: ...
Beldr: fuckin' hell, i've gotta start takin' the names of the peeps i terrorize.
Beldr: okay, the fuck are you called?
Yuzu: I'm Yuzu.
Atsuro: Atsuro.
Keisuke: Keisuke.
Beldr: uh-huh... uh-huh... got it. what about Hipster McCatphones over there?
MC: I'm just the main character.
Beldr: Right. Whatevs. Listen up, M - can I call you M?
MC: Eh. Go for it.
Beldr: Right. Listen up, M. I'm thinkin' I'm gonna give my posse a ring-a-ding, maybe throw down some Vampiric Mist, kill a couple hundred humans, see what happens. That coo'?
MC: Uh. No?
Beldr: Ain't.
Beldr: That.
Beldr: A.
Beldr: Shame.
BOSS FIGHT:
BELDR
MC: Okay, Atsuro, magic isn't gonna help us here and you're the strongest physical fighter by far. Take the Mistletoe and give 'im hell, we'll carve a path for you through the lackies.
Atsuro: No, MC.
MC: ...Why not?
Atsuro: No, MC.
MC: ...
MC: Why not?
Beldr: Yo! C!
Cait Sith: Lord Beldr?
Beldr: Did he or did he not just say he had some motherfuckin' mistletoe?
Cait Sith: He did, Lord Beldr.
Beldr: Well that's great. That's just fuckin' wonderful. You know how many places there are in the world, C?
Cait Sith: Well-
Beldr: You know the fuckin' odds of showing up in the same place as an ugly motherfucker carrying some mistletoe? This shit is literally a one in a billion chance. When we get outta here I'm buyin' a fuckin' lottery ticket.
Cait Sith: I don't think it works like-
Beldr: funny
Beldr: i'll tell you what i don't think
Beldr: i don't think i pay you to think, C
Beldr: i pay you to find the guy with mistletoe and kill his stupid ass
Beldr: he needs to be taken out of this equation like a fuckin' complex fraction. get subtractin', C!
[The Cait Siths go to attack my character.]
MC: Seriously? Cats? this is the best beldr's got. okay then. you guys realize that i can win most battles singelehandedly, right?
[MC gets the crap beaten out of him]
MC: okay
MC: i was not expecting that
MC: uh... little help? yuzu? atsuro? other guy?
Yuzu: little busy right now MC!
Atsuro: and I died several turns ago!
Keisuke: and I suffer from nothing at all!
MC: then get over here
Keisuke: oh, okay. i'll just use my devil speed.
Keisuke: the devil speed i don't have.
Keisuke: and never did.
MC: ...
Keisuke: ...
MC: ...
Keisuke: ...
MC: are you going to do it soon?
Keisuke: no.
[Yuzu, MC, and Keisuke manage to weather the assaults until their next turns.]
MC: wait wait wait
MC: wait
MC: wait
MC: you can summon new demons to replace defeated ones
Yuzu: ...
Keisuke: ...
Yuzu: Say it.
MC: i don't wanna
Yuzu: Say it.
MC: ...
MC: I AM KENRI
MC: I DON'T UNDERSTAND SIMPLE MENU OPTIONS
MC: I'M JUST SUCH A GUY
Yuzu: thank you
Yuzu: admitting you have a problem is the first step
[Eventually, the MC is back in fighting shape. He attacks Beldr.]
Beldr: Whoa whoa whoa WHOA! M! My man! My main man M! The man with the mistletoe! Let's not do anything hasty here!
MC: Actually, this has taken longer than I like already. Time to end it.
Beldr: Hold it! C'mon, man! It was real funny the way you took out C! Remember? He was like "I'mma getcha!" and then you were like "Cool off" and you froze him with Mabufu? Good times! Look, we don't have to fight! Just put the fuckin' mistletoe down.
Beldr: just
Beldr: just put the fuckin' mistletoe down, man
Beldr: just put it down
MC: Don't think so.
Beldr: Aww shit. Don't make me beg, man! Look, I can make a contract with you! I come cheap! We'd make a bitchin' team! M and B, tearin' shit up!
MC: ...
MC: tell me more
[Lion King Eltshan shows up.]
Eltshan: ROAR, MISTOLTIN!
[Eltshan cuts Beldr in half with Mistoltin.]
Yuzu: what the
MC: wait! Eltshan! come back! I want an autograph!
Yuzu: he's gone
MC: i know, goddammit
Yuzu: ...
MC: ...
Yuzu: this was not a satisfactory conclusion to our battle
MC: beats "oh by the way i'm resummoning all the lackeys you killed WHOOPS DIED BEFORE ANY COULD REACH YOU"
Yuzu: I guess.
The plot hole is that the mistletoe charm was being sold by a guy who sells things from the woods. Not miscellaneous crap to stick on your phone. Even if someone else gave him the charm, that doesn't explain why he actually agreed to sell it. [/spoiler]
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Advanced
MC: I AM KENRI
MC: I DON'T UNDERSTAND SIMPLE MENU OPTIONS
MC: I'M JUST SUCH A GUY
Another fun menu thing: Today I was playing through day 3 when I actually -ran out- of events and non-free battles. I scrolled around the locations for about 10 seconds wondering what the fuck happened before a tutorial popped up saying, "Oh hey Epyon you can pass time for free with the Y button and this is pretty much the only time you should ever consider doing that".
Thanks game! [/spoiler]
---
"Because nothing says "level 80 dark elf warlock" like "radical 19th century feminist"!" -Ogordemir99 on World of Wollstonecraft
Editor
[Spoiler for Devil Survivor Overclocked, click to show]-We find and talk to the mysterious guy from earlier. He says that a bunch of gods of death are in a war to become King of Bel. Beliel, Beldr, Jezebel, Belzeboul, etc, I dunno, I think I'm missing one or two. Now that we killed Beldr, we have his power, so the rest of them are going to be after us now. "welp"
-wait. did he just call me naoya's younger brother? but... it thought we were cousins... wtf.
...
DEFEAT NAOYA'S ELDER BROTHER
-nap time
-Day 4. Our Laplace Mail arrives. Keisuke has no idea what that is, apparently only we receive it. It says that Midori will die, Haru will probably die, and then civilization will collapse. yay.
-Keisuke gets pissed that Midori will apparently be killed by humans rather than demons. I don't see how it makes a difference. It's been made abundantly clear by this point that there are good humans and bad humans, and good demons and bad demons. We should focus on defending the good from the bad. Which is which doesn't really matter.
-Keisuke suggests we preemptively take them out, which makes sense, because they're murderers and we'd be acting in self-defense (besides which, we could just go into non-lethal damage mode like we have against all other human foes so far) but the party rejects the idea for some reason so Keisuke storms off, dropping his death clock down to 1 in the process.
-atsuro has an idea to hack into the COMPs' server and gain control of all demons simultaneously
atsuro, listen to me
that is
the best idea
that i have ever heard
and i fully endorse spending 100% of our time accomplishing it
-we find a mysterious woman who talks about how the human government and remiel are both being too lenient by not just wiping out all humans ASAP
why do these people just talk aloud about major plot points
i don't get it
-we continue trying to convince midori to stop using demons to help people
i have an idea
let's use our demons to help her like we have several times before
perfectly logical
-amane basically taunts us to find the server
-We talk to Azuma, one of the higher-ups in the Shomonkai. He says the server is in a place where humans can't get to it anymore.
So.
It's Haru's voice, right.
they somehow hid it in haru's voice
that is the plot twist here
-we also learn from the shomonkai founder that belial is an eternal flame.
dialogue options:
We'll need to be ready.
Bring on the ice.
you can probably guess which one i chose
-i talk to gin about aya. apparently she was kidnapped by the shomonkai?
...
okay so.
so they kidnapped aya and used her voice to create the server somehow, but now aya has passed it along to haru.
this makes sense.
-midori's getting attacked by normal, COMP-less humans. now, they're not a threat at all, and she could kick all their asses, and she'd be justified in doing so, but still, we've gotta save her!
yeah!
because it will be bad if the public turns even more against demon tamers!
yeah!
now let's save midori by using our demons to beat up these people.
yeah!
-i really wonder what would happen if i didn't have any demons on any of my teams for this fight.
-the humans start to retreat, but keisuke shows up to stop them. he demands justice, and so forms a pact with Yama. and then, he becomes Kira.
-Keisuke: Don't try to interfere! If you do, I'll defeat you too!
well somebody got his daily dose of suicidal overconfidence today
see, look. you only survived the round because i was going for maximum EXP and didn't want you to die first.
what a joke.
-keisuke leaves with yama, shouting something about how he'd have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for us meddling kids and that garm. why didn't we smash his COMP? i dunno. that is a very good question.
-Atsuro: Even if Midori is attacked by civilians, she won't fight back.
WHY NOT?
IT'S SELF-DEFENSE, AND MORE TO THE POINT, IT TEACHES A VALUABLE LESSON: "BE DUMBASS, EXPERIENCE DUMBASS CONSEQUENCES"
THIS ISN'T HARD
-we learn that azuma will be in roppongi at noon in two days, and that we should ask him about aya then. we then relay this to gin. ...but when we do, his death clock goes down. whoops.
-we convince midori that she should help people the correct way, which is much like what she's been doing so far, except now she's part of our party, so it's okay!
-midori gets keisuke's demons. good thing he didn't take them with him when he left!
-we convince azuma to let us take naoya's shit from when he was working for the shomonkai. we'll pick it up tomorrow. hopefully we'll get a clue or two out of it.
-we beat up some demon tamers who are terrorizing some dude. they say that they're planning to take on the SDF.
MC: that sounds reasonable, let us leave these enterprising gentlemen in peace
Yuzu, Atsuro, and Midori: BUT THOU MUST
MC: grumble, grumble
-After the battle, our party discusses the possibility of rogue demon tamers waging war on the SDF.
Dialogue options:
We'll stop them.
Let's not interfere.
you can guess which one i picked. "but thou must".
-even though i picked the "cowardly" (read: sensible) option there, midori starts hitting on me.
god.
-we find shoji. she's figured out some more stuff about the lockdown, including the existence of angels, which our party finds surprising.
...
you know
aside from the angel that's in our party
-anyway, the angels are giving orders to the government or something, WHATEVER, already knew this
-shoji is the BEST character
like, i seriously cannot imagine any possible choice that this game could throw my way where i would not immediately side with shoji
such a good character
just completely verbally destroys yuzu there, it's wonderful
-Okay, I think it's time to address a growing concern, which is that several of my demons are outdated. These include: Garm x2, Hairy Jack, and Lilim. Lilim's not a problem, I just replaced her with a newly fused Ishtar (even if Lilim is cooler looking).
Hairy Jack finally has something useful available now that I have a Pendragon, which is Shiisaa. Really wanted something with Animal Leg or Devil Speed, but I guess Switch is probably even better than Animal Leg, so that works. More importantly, I passed over like 5 points of Str, which is amazing.
The Garms represent a serious issue though, because I'm not fusing them into anything that doesn't have Devil Speed. And very few things with Devil Speed are available. The good news is that 17 Str is still extremely viable, even if they get OHK'd by any sort of ice spell, including Mabufu. So it's not a big issue yet, but they're really on borrowed time.
-we find Kaido and Honda terrorizing random people, presumably people who were trying to take them out for being demon tamers. I can understand Kaido, but this is seriously out of character for Honda. Kaido I can buy, he wants to rule the world (this is an actual thing), but Honda? Ehh...
-Anyway, Kaido's defense is that they deserve it, which is... probably true, but hey, it's still kind of a dick move, and free EXP is free EXP.
-Pazuzu is scary, but only because it gets two actions per turn. Other than that it dies to ice magic just like everything else that dies to ice magic.
-Honda's still worthless, though. Literally one-rounded by my character.
-Haru: i'm sad and going to kill myself
MC: no don't
Haru: okay
-Kaido says that some of his buddies in his gang have been killed by a guy with glasses ranting about justice. He asks if we know anything about him.
...
dude.
keisuke was on our team when we had that stupid-ass demon hunting competition with you
also, we ain't telling you shit
-time to go take out both the crazy-ass law-aligned dude and the crazy-ass chaos-aligned dude, because seriously, why would you ever side with either of them
in any game, not just this one
-We see Ms. Mari running away in a hurry and decide to follow! She's being chased by a vampire! She's acting weird! oh god. this isn't going to be some twilight bullshit, is it?
-Kudlak: Your smell is dichotomous! I require gusto! Stop me here, or merge with me, Kresnik!
Mari?: go back to bed, kudlak
MC: Hey so, you might want to run away. Right now.
Mari?: Which way do you suggest I go?
MC: No, not you.
MC: The demon.
MC: Assuming he wants to live.
Mari?: Wait! No! You mustn't kill him! He'll revive even more powerful!
MC: You know what I just heard?
Yuzu: Infinite free EXP?
MC: BINGO.
Mari?: seriously though which way should i run.
MC: Down the stairs and towards us.
Mari?: That would require bypassing Kudlak. I assume you have a plan?
MC: Yep.
Mari?: Very well. Until you can put it into place, I will go the other way.
MC: ...
MC: You're not really "up" on this idea of being a team player, are you.
[We crush some of Kudlak's minions.]
MC: Okay, in just about the right spot... now!
[MC Switches with Mari.]
Kudlak: Clever girl! Your gusto is sufficient! Let us prognosticate with violence!
MC: ...
Kudlak: The late bird starves! Why do you wait, lady?
MC: I'm waiting for you to mess up a Skill Crack so I can justify fighting you.
Kudlak: ...
Kudlak: Your gusto is, in retrospect, insufficient. I shall seek worthier prey. O Kresnik~ Release me from this boring woman!
MC: ...
MC: Okay, the lady cracks? Those? Those were the last straw.
[Kresnik 02 begins to play.]
MC: You want to see Kresnik? You want to look into the eyes of the man who will prevent the end of days? I have cast Beldr back into Hel and prevented the murder of hundreds! I have seen a great many things, and I know a bitch when I see one.
MC: And right now?
MC: You're lookin' pretty bitch.
Mari?: SERIOUSLY DON'T KILL HIM
Mari?: I WAS NOT JOKING ABOUT THAT BEING BAD
[MC crushes Kudlak's team but leaves Kudlak alive.]
MC: Know this.
MC: The only reason you are still alive is because I have been thoroughly yelled at to not kill you.
Kudlak: This beating fills me with pain. Your cup runneth over with gusto! Its supply is inelastic! We'll meet again, Kresnik and lady-friend!
MC: I AM A MAN
-After the battle, we learn that Kresnik is a demon that was summoned by Mari's desire to find the bloodless killer. Right now Kresnik is possessing Mari of her own free will. Its opposite is Kudlak, presumably the killer. There's only one way to kill Kudlak such that is doesn't revive. We need to use amnion powder, but Mari lost her bag of it somewhere in the park.
...
sigh
-We see some policeman using demons to terrorize civvies and take their food, so we step in.
I get why we're not killing civvies who overreact and attack demon tamers, but why aren't we taking out these guys? I have no idea. It seems like the right thing to do, here.
-there are like 7 skills to crack and i only have 4 characters. awful.
-we actually lose R1 because a policeman gets like three turns in a row and kills a civvie. "welp"
-this time we're actually using strategy.
-yeah, that tends to help.
-we win easily this time.
-We find Mari's bag and will return it tomorrow.
-Dawn of the 5th Day.
-So... today, we have to: 1) get Naoya's shit from the Shomonkai, 2) defeat Belial, 3) stop Keisuke, Kaido, or preferably both, 4) return Mari's bag and take out Kudlak, 5) save the girl, and 6) save the world.
ALL IN A DAY'S WORK
-we give ms. mari her bag, get a comp full of naoya's shit from the shomonkai, see that amane is hesitant to go along with the angels' plan for the shomonkai, yell at keisuke for a while, and then get jumped by SDF officers.
-(regarding the SDF soldiers wanting to kill all demon tamers so that the lockdown will be lifted)
Yuzu: "Isn't that an incredibly stupid reason to want to kill us?! I can't believe this!"
THAT QUOTE
SUMMARIZES THE ENTIRE GAME
-we smash the SDF apart, thus proving that they are not a threat for us and that we could leave this lockdown whenever we want.
and we have absolutely no reason not to.
-oh no marinik is being attacked by kudlak let's get him
Kudlak: Today is a scrumptious day. It's a raspberry tart filled with death! I'm so happy, I could actualize a potentialization! Productivity = Effort^2, Kresnik!
MC: Yeah, whatever you're talking about? It's not going to happen.
Marinik: You all... All right, let's do this together! Remember to give me the final blow!
MC: Got it. Beat him within an inch of his life. Standard anti-human tactics, everyone!
Kudlak: Hair today, gan tomorrow, MC! Murder for a jar of red rum? Never odd or even! Let's swap blood, ladies!
MC: SHUT
Yuzu: THE
Atsuro: FUCK
Midori: UP
[The party takes the field.]
Atsuro: So we're gonna smash Kudlak real fast, right?
MC: Actually no, we're going to dick around for a long time getting Skill Cracks first.
Yuzu: As is our wont.
MC: Yup.
[MC's party smashes some demons, or attempts to anyway, with moderate success. Marinik attacks Kudlak, deals basically no damage, and nearly gets killed in return.]
Kudlak: KinserK, yracs saw taht! An amnion - no! In mana?! You can't quit me, I'm fired!
[Kudlak attempts to flee, and summons some more demons to cover his escape.]
Marinik: Don't let him get away!
MC: WE'RE KIND OF IN MORTAL PERIL RIGHT NOW, GOD
[Somehow, the team manages to get significantly more competent fast, and wipes out most of the demons while blocking Kudlak's escape.]
Atsuro: These crows are tough little bastards.
Yuzu: At least they're not smart.
[Yuzu stares at the crows that are attacking MC instead of finishing off a 1 HP Marinik.]
MC: Uh, little help?!
Yuzu: Out of MP, sorry.
Midori: Same here.
Atsuro: And I never had any to start with!
MC: ...you guys realize kudlak is resisant to physical attacks, right
Yuzu: ...
Midori: ...
Atsuro: ...
MC: ...welp. this'll be interesting, then.
[They take out the remaining demons and start whittling away Kudlak.]
Kudlak: No! I'm taking it - your love, your anger, and all of your sorrow! My left arm is heavy! My right hand is sore! Kresnik, the monsters, instead of me! (It's < my)2 dieeeeeeeeee!
[Marinik finishes off Kudlak. The party regroups...]
Mari: In my grief, I was filled with desire to exact vengeance. Kresnik came to my aid... and together, we were able to defeat Kudlak. Now, I'll finally be able to go on with my life. Without this weight on my shoulders, I can start moving towards a brighter future! MC, Atsuro, other people, thank you for everything!
[Mari's death clock disappears.]
MC: you remember that we're still all doomed, right
Mari: ...
[Mari's death clock returns and shows 2.]
Mari: goddammit
MC: So...
MC: Reward?
Kresnik: I will allow you to fuse myself and Kudlak in the Cathedral of Shadows.
MC: "Thanks for taking out my archnemesis and saving my life, MC. In exchange, I'll give you the ability to create two worthless pieces of shit."
Kresnik: ...i suppose i deserve that
MC: seriously though, where the fuck is my real reward?
-Midori wants to give our team a special name because she thinks this is a sentai show or something, but my character tells her that it's not happening.
*crosses arms*
this is serious, young lady [/spoiler]
---
"There's a pony in the shop, but don't buy it. It might do something unfortunate to you." ~from the first Summoner's Seal topic
Advanced
-atsuro has an idea to hack into the COMPs' server and gain control of all demons simultaneously
atsuro, listen to me
that is
the best idea
that i have ever heard
and i fully endorse spending 100% of our time accomplishing it
I totally did my first playthrough, went with Atsuro's route. It's actually a much better ending than one would expect.
-midori's getting attacked by normal, COMP-less humans. now, they're not a threat at all, and she could kick all their asses, and she'd be justified in doing so, but still, we've gotta save her!
yeah!
because it will be bad if the public turns even more against demon tamers!
yeah!
now let's save midori by using our demons to beat up these people.
yeah!
Perfectly reasonable!!!!
-Okay, I think it's time to address a growing concern, which is that several of my demons are outdated. These include: Garm x2, Hairy Jack, and Lilim. Lilim's not a problem, I just replaced her with a newly fused Ishtar (even if Lilim is cooler looking).
...
kenri those demons are absolute shit for day 4. >_>
[/spoiler]
---
"Because nothing says "level 80 dark elf warlock" like "radical 19th century feminist"!" -Ogordemir99 on World of Wollstonecraft