Let's Read Reviews! matrixstream757's Metroid Prime 3 review (S1R7)
Hello, everyone! Going back to more traditional Let's Reads, today we have a guy who seems to hate everything disproportionately. This is GameFAQs user matrixstream757's Metroid Prime 3: Corruption review.
Title: An absolutely terrible ending to a great series.
Except that the Metroid series isn't over.
Nor is the Prime subseries over, if the sequel hook at the end is to be believed.
In this review, I am stating my opinion about this game.
In this Let's Read, water is wet, the sky is blue, and ducks quack.
Also, you're stupid.
I hope that this helps you decide weather you will get this game or not.
The forecast calls for a high chance of clarification. There won't be a single cloud of doubt left in anyone's mind after reading this review. You'll rush out to the game store fast as lightning to purchase either this game or something else. I'll try not to rain on anyone's parade, because my aim is to help any and squall of my readers.
...
I apologize for that hurricane of puns.
If I were you, I would just pass this game by.
If you were me, you wouldn't have written this review, so you wouldn't... be me... but then...
Damn it, matrixstream757! You've created a time paradox.
Plot: 2/10.
Admittedly, it isn't as good as the plots of previous Metroid games. For example, "you're on a planet and you need to kill stuff". Or "you're on a planet and you need to kill certain stuff". Or "you're on a planet and you need to kill some bosses and all their stuff".
I can keep going.
In the main body of the game, you are trying to destroy these seeds that get launched at some planets.
See what I mean? Worst plot ever.
You go to several different planets and destroy the seeds.
I believe that was implied by "you are trying to destroy these seeds that get launched at some planets".
But the ending is so bad that is cancels out every good detail of the plotline before it.
I've seen this complaint before but honestly, I still don't even know what the hell it's referring to. Nothing about the ending ever struck me as even slightly offensive or, in fact, unusual in any way.
Just keep that in mind as you play this game.
You gave it a 2/10. Like hell I'm going to both trust your opinions and play the game.
Graphics: 6/10.
Get out.
The graphics are decent in this game, at least that's one good thing about it.
You realize your overall score doesn't have to be an average, right? You don't have to knock certain sections just to bring it down. You can say the graphics are good and still give the game a low score. It's not like graphics ever actually matter.
But there are still many much better games with much better graphics.
In 2007, on the Wii?
The graphics is increased from the earlier Metroid Prime games, but it is still just average.
Metroid Prime - the original Metroid Prime - could be rereleased right now and its graphics still would not be "just average". To say nothing of Metroid Prime 3.
Some things in the game could have been much more detailed.
All right, fine. I'll play your game. Let's see what you've got.
Gameplay: 3/10.
Oh.
The gameplay tool a giant step down from the first Metroid Prime game, which came to my huge disappointment.
The gameplay... tool?
Because Metroid Prime 2 took a step up from Metroid Prime 1, I kind of expected MP3 to be a step up from MP2.
Well, that is how sequels work.
But nope, there are far fewer puzzles in this game, and they are far easier then those in MP2.
There's no Dark Aether, though, so let's call it a toss-up.
Though the only reason I didn't give this a 0/10 is because of the shooting.
You seem to have a very warped perception of how scores work. A 0/10? Really?
There is no other game where you can put your aimer away from the center of the screen.
...
what
Though this is not a reason to get this game because they will soon remake MP1 and MP2 with the same control scheme as this game.
Nintendo must love you.
"Don't buy new games! Buy the games you've already played. Again and again and again."
Another terrible thing about this game is how they tell you where to go.
Basically every Metroid game "tells you where to go". Metroid Prime has hints, Metroid Prime 2 you have to talk to somebody (I think), Fusion is extremely linear, Metroid 2 seals off previous areas as you progress... I mean, there's Super Metroid and the original Metroid, but those are hardly indicative of the whole series, much as some fans want them to be.
One of the awesome things about the earlier Metroid Prime games is that is was kind of like an RPG at times.
Metroid approaches!
Samus casts Ice Missile!
Metroid took 27392 damage!
Metroid casts Energy Drain!
Samus took 1876 damage!
Metroid recovered 1876 health!
"Frozen water, spread! Chill the world! PHENDRANA!"
Samus summons Phendrana!
Metroid took 9999 damage!
Metroid was felled!
Samus gained 278 EXP!
(Alternate spell quotes: "Mightiest of all raiders, ransack the galaxy! OMEGA PIRATE!", "Kyaah! Round and around you go! PONCHI!", "The GF's wish to destroy all minds... VALHALLA!", and finally, "You'll get no sympathy from me! DARK AETHER!")
Metroid Prime 3 is very strait forward and boring. It definitely took away one of Metroid Prime's best feels.
It really wasn't much more straightforward than Metroid Prime 1. If you just followed the plot and didn't explore at all, I guess so, but that would seem to be contradictory to your point anyway.
Characters: 0/10.
...Seriously?
You're rating a Metroid game?
On its characters?
A Metroid game?
This could be one of the key reasons why this game is so terrible. The characters in this game took away the only original feel that Metroid Prime had left.
So, you're one of "them".
One of those guys who claims "Metroid is all about isolation with no talking or other characters ever".
Even though Metroid has always, always, always had backstory that explained that, yes, there were other characters, and yes, Samus does have contact with them and talk to them.
Don't read the manga, is all I can say.
[Editor's note: Lines removed on account of spoilers.]
Well, I suppose that's one way to make people not want to play the game.
Dick.
Difficulty: 2/10.
With all these pointless sections, I sure hope "Controls" is coming up. Or "Story" maybe, because we did have "Characters".
This is definitely the easiest Metroid Prime game.
Confirm/Deny: He played on the lowest difficulty.
Like I said before, they tell you where to go throughout the whole game.
...That has nothing to do with difficulty.
The battle is absurdly simple due to the fact of that new
Kenri of the Yuri is just this guy who writes silly things, sometimes. He is profoundly embarrassed about a good 60-70% of the stuff he's written. You might know him better as your friendly neighborhood Level 43: Editor. View his or her author page or author profile.
Rated 9 out of 10 by 1 users.